Death Fantasies - Do You Have Them?

- In what way do you imagine dying in your fantasies?
It started out as a dream from my childhood, I would go up this huge spiral staircase as far up as I could and jump off the railing, falling for what seemed like an hour and waking just before hitting the floor. What was so great about it was the feeling it gave me. Like I was weightless. Curiosity of what was on the other side, what happens after death. It was exciting. Something about falling is just.. Idk. It feels right. It's my favorite and I can think about it for days or even weeks at a time.
Also walking into the ocean/bay and going on until I drown.

- Is it a sexual turn on to fantasize about dying or is there some other reason behind it?
Dying isn't a turn on but it's because of the feeling that I get. It fills me with a great peace.
I would think about dying all of the time when I was a child. Some guy taking me, strapping me to a table and cutting me open. Seeing all the organs was pretty cool and back then I couldn't feel anything if it was a dream. Maybe it switched to falling when it started hurting.. Anyways, being kidnapped was a popular choice. Tortured by some stranger. But some of the time it was pretty sexual, don't know when exactly that changed.. Was a filthy little kid back then. Like.. I was really young, about 5-9. Around 9 it changed to being non-sexual and more about falling and drowning.

- Have you ever considered fulfilling your fantasy in real life?
Yes, to get that feeling. Also when I would get depressed from detoxing or was just in a bad place for a while. It would lift my spirits for a moment or two. Or just because. For no real reason.

- Have you ever put yourself in a dangerous position that could have killed you in the same way you fantasize about dying? If yes, explain.
Haven't had the chance.

- In what way do you imagine dying in your fantasies?

Executions, usually lethal injection. Other times I think about shooting myself in the chest or cutting off body parts, often to see what's inside and to bleed to death.

- Is it a sexual turn on to fantasize about dying or is there some other reason behind it?

The parts related to blood, mutilation, and dying itself are mildly erotic. I find it mostly just exciting to think about.

- Have you ever considered fulfilling your fantasy in real life?

I wouldn't kill or maim myself just to fulfill a fantasy. I might get into the habit of donating blood just to see it, though.

- Have you ever put yourself in a dangerous position that could have killed you in the same way you fantasize about dying? If yes, explain.

Not really. I've had the opportunity to kill myself with a friend's firearm, and I almost got stuck half way between the surprisingly strong door grip of a max train, although I doubt they would have started moving until it closed.

Clothes consist of a white collared long sleeve dress shirt (button down collar though (no stays) button cuffs (no cufflinks for this show)). Pants are very comfortable khakis (perfectly pressed (although the length is slightly too short (need to change my cleaners, I think to myself))). Brown leather belt. White athletic cotton socks. Brown leather oxford shoes. Hair is combed. Face shaved. Sleeves rolled up to my forearms, and hands in my pockets to start.

Eyes are closed. Feelin the sun. Smellin the ocean. Sensing the weather at this point... 72 degrees, mostly sunny, slight breeze (perfect)... A full smile on my face starts. Teeth and all

Eyes open. Sight is a bit blurry to start with, but it recovers quickly. In front of my brown shoes is a narrow sandy path surrounded on both sides by green green grass. Notice a collection of people on both sides down the path. In the very far distance a very tall tree sitting on a hill overlooking the ocean. (sigh) I start my walk/head down (hands still in pockets, smile has faded to the normal crooked one (the corner of my mouth always goin to the right with no teeth)).

I make my way to the crowd. To my left are the folks that I helped/loved me in my life. To the right are the folks who I hurt/loved me in my life. Dead eyes and blank expressions are the same on both sides. I shake each hand on both sides and bow my head a bit (slight squint in my eyes). "Sorry" is all I can say to both sides. No reaction from the crowd. Just the blank looks.

Made my way through the crowd. A sense of relief. I don't look back. I just make my way through to the tree on the hill (smellin the ocean and feelin the weather). Under the tree the is the most beautiful girl. Her face is perfect. Hair is long (although her hair color will change from time to time (only thing that ever seems to change in this fantasy) the style always remains the same). White dress. No shoes. Bare foot. (I can hear the waves now ).

She crooked smiles me and asks "What are you drinkin?" "Bourbon ma'am, and you know how I like it" I reply. She hands me the drink, and I sit between her legs underneath the tree (looking at the ocean/ feelin the weather/smellin the weather), she runs her fingers through my hair (feels good/relaxing). I take the first sip and bleh... She gave me a bourbon neat. "Where the hell is the ice?" I ask. Her reply is "fraid where you're goin [name] ice melts quite fast, so no need for it".

I let out a combination of a laugh and cough at the same time. I hold my right fist to my mouth tryin to control the laughin/coughin fit, and then I feel a slight twang in my neck (injection)... I reach with my left hand and say "$#%^ I think I just got stung by a...." "Shush she whispers... (continues to stroke my hair) just keep looking out at the ocean." I smile...take a sip...and everything goes dark.

- In what way do you imagine dying in your fantasies?
I usually don't fantasize about anything. But that is a semantical argument we shouldn't probably get into. I do ponder things though. I've always been amazed that I have lived as long as I have. But I have pondered death and have come to the conclusion I am not convinced I will die a natural death. I have been close to death many times in my lifetime. I've always wondered what people would think about my death and what they would say when I'm gone. I always wondered what my death would mean to others and how it would effect them. I believe I probably will die in a struggle. Probably shot by some sort of firearm or blown away by missle or bomb. I always believed I wouldn't have a proper burial and will rot where I fall. Becoming archeology.
- Is it a sexual turn on to fantasize about dying or is there some other reason behind it?
No
- Have you ever considered fulfilling your fantasy in real life?
No
- Have you ever put yourself in a dangerous position that could have killed you in the same way you fantasize about dying? If yes, explain.
People have attempted to murder me. I have been shot at more than once.

Demon wrote:While I don't have them myself, I've chatted to a lot of people over the years that have actual death fantasies.

One guy I chatted to wanted to be murdered in a wedding gown as a sacrifice to Satan.
Another guy wanted to be spit-roasted and eaten while still alive.
Another one wanted to dress up in latex and be strangled to death.
And yet another wanted to be hung above the alter in a church.

The different ways people fantasize about being murdered in particular is interesting to me because I fantasize about killing people. Discovering different ways people want to be killed can enhance my own fantasies.

I met someone who wanted to die by being walked on with sharp spiked heels, and it was a sexual attraction for them, well I met a lot of people who had death fantasies, but I found that one to be the most interesting. Oh - and funny delusional people who think they are immortal - now that's always interesting!

Don't have death fantasies myself, but if I were to choose I still wouldn't mind dying during sex, haha most awesome way to die, especially if the person wasn't expecting it and it traumatized the person having sex with me. It would be a lot better if I was a dude and died stiff with priapism, and then someone came a long and had their way with my corpse.
Or maybe it would be just like romeo and juliet lol jk. Back in the day, I used to have a huge list compiled of the most "interesting ways to die", it was fascinating, but I can't remember where I went with that.

Truthfully i have tried having "dominant" sexual encounters, with people who just want to renact death or violence and I really suck at it, because I get so angry, i hate them so much, i find them so unworthy, i don't view them as worthy enough to be alive, let alone the last thing i want to do is please them. I even suck at those typical dominating sex games, because I can't stop myself from really hurting them. Submissive people really piss me off, even I can be better at being submissive than that, it's so pitiful. I just get so pissed off. Submissive people all turn out to be whiny, complaining, "but i don't like that, your supposed to do things i like" and im like "STFU no im not, you suck at being submissive." It's like Follow my commands: No thanks, can you just lick my bumhoolio? = ill do what i want when i want to, and it's not gonna be what you want, goshhhhhhh. Yeah i totally failed at that.

Neige wrote:Trolling for victims?
I don't have death fantasies.

If they are willing are they a victim?

Rape for instance, if an attacker were to "pounce" on a "victim" that "wanted it" and "played along" so in the end enjoyed it, surely thats not a victim?



Just a shame that the more willing "victims" don't show up I guess

Comingoutofmyshell wrote:If they are willing are they a victim?

Rape for instance, if an attacker were to "pounce" on a "victim" that "wanted it" and "played along" so in the end enjoyed it, surely thats not a victim?

If they make themselves a victim then they are technically a victim - by choice. Obviously they're not a victim in the same sense as a non-willing victim, but they're still a victim none-the-less. Then again, the term 'willing participant' would probably be a more appropriate definition.

Just a shame that the more willing "victims" don't show up I guess

I couldn't agree more. I was really hoping to get more responses to this thread.

Demon wrote:
If they make themselves a victim then they are technically a victim - by choice. Obviously they're not a victim in the same sense as a non-willing victim, but they're still a victim none-the-less.

so... if you were looking for a victim that was not a real victim - i.e. by choice, would you feel cheated?

Demon wrote:I couldn't agree more. I was really hoping to get more responses to this thread.

Yeah... rape... 'tis appealing

Comingoutofmyshell wrote:so... if you were looking for a victim that was not a real victim - i.e. by choice, would you feel cheated?

If I broke into someone's home and started victimizing the occupant only to discover they were enjoying it, I wouldn't feel cheated as such, but I would certainly be pissed off. I'd hurt them until they begged for mercy and pleaded for me to stop. There would be no pleasure in their pain when I'm done with them.

Yeah... rape... 'tis appealing

I'm not sure what you're alluding to here.

Demon wrote:
If I broke into someone's home and started victimizing the occupant only to discover they were enjoying it, I wouldn't feel cheated as such, but I would certainly be pissed off. I'd hurt them until they begged for mercy and pleaded for me to stop. There would be no pleasure in their pain when I'm done with them.

comes to mind: [link removed]

Demon wrote:

Yeah... rape... 'tis appealing

I'm not sure what you're alluding to here.

at what point does one cross the line. I suppose this goes for both, the 'victim' and 'aggressor'.