Mbti, enneagrams and relationships

Squaredonutwheels wrote:I'm curious about this stuff, but the quiz format p1sses me off too much.

Same; I get bored half way through the questions most of the time.

Bored at the airport, so did my wife's enneagram: I took her for a 1, but she said she did her own and got 7 or 9.

I'm INFP and my bf is ISTJ.
For a fact, he took the test himself.

Just did mine again: ENTP-A / ENTP-T

Greebo wrote:Mine: 1w2 sx/so EII-Fi (INFj-T)

So do you identify more with INFP or INFJ?

Back to the original question:

My man, ISTP 5w6, like Magnus Carlsen and ZeroZ. So was my father, and the father of my father.
The bestest combination in my eyes, super analytical without pretension.

My mother ESFP 7 something, deep into the shadow, so INTJ-like, extremely elitist and rigid, but with neither the long-ranging, strategic perks of the INTJ or the warm, fun-loving ones of the ESFP.

My mother's mother, ESTJ, most likely an 8. She is very stable compared to my Mum, though equally manipulative in a cold detached no apparent emotional drama kind of way. She's the patriarch of the family, and while I admire the pragmatism that helped her raise the social status of the family from dirt poor to middle class, her divide and conquer attitude has ruined the possibility for emotional honesty between family members, forever...

Her husband was perhaps ISFP, perhaps a 9 or a 6. Total mop. Lived in the basement. I don't hold it against him though, he had the roughest most inhumane childhood.

Friendship wise, a memorable friend of mine was ENTP. In the rare occurrences where he was not up to something really silly, I would gladly take over .

The major figure of my childhood, in the absence of other stable figure: an ISTJ e1 teacher. I'm nothing like her, but the persistence and little discipline I have, I definitely owe it to her.

justonemoreperson wrote:Just did mine again: ENTP-A / ENTP-T

You wrote once that you identify with ENTJ, is ENTP a better fit?

ISTP & 5w6. Both seem fairly accurate and also seem to sync up well with each other.

Greebo wrote:Well I had fun doing this even if no one else did though I’m not sure there are any particularly meaningful patterns here. My parents and my partner were all around today and we ended up having a sit down and going through it together which is why those ones are different.

Mine: 1w2 sx/so EII-Fi (INFj-T)
Mother: 6w5 so/sp LSI-Se (ISTj-T)
Father: 1w2 sx/sp EII-Ne (INFj-A)
Spouse: 7w6 sx/so IEE-Fi (ENFp-A)

This group is the clan. The names won’t mean anything but I needed to be able to distinguish them for my own sake. Asterisks denote the friends that date back to sixth form and for whom I can remember the results of their original self tests. The rest is done based on my own judgement of them, I managed to get one of my Mother’s jungian dichotomies for the mbti wrong in the previous group so there are probably a few mistakes here and there.

Doormat: 8w9 ENFJ-A*
Strange: 8w7 ENTJ-A*
Lula: 7w8 ESFP-T*
Mark: 5w4 INTJ-A
Gez: 6w5 ISFJ-T*
Katie: 4w5 INTP-T*
Emily: 9w8 ESFP-A
Faiqs: 2w3 INFP-A
Tori: 4w5 INFP-A
Alice: 7w8 ESTP-A

These three are my mentors who other than my friends and parents have probably had the most dramatic impact on my life.
Klaus: 3w4 ENTJ-T
Simon: 5w6 INTP-T
Erin: 3w2 ESTJ-A

Interesting how your mentors have two 3's where as the clan seems to be balanced with a little helping of everything except 3's. It gives the impression that the clan isn't achievement focused but having some kind of stable balance as it's core values.
Also you're the only 1 in the clan other than your family. I wonder what it would be like to have a 1 as a father.

Greebo wrote:As for your daughter ISTP is typically 5 but also occationally 6-9. I know she’s had issues with aggression and anxiety. Taking a wild swing, and assuming she hasn’t followed In your footsteps, I might look at 6 for the single solitary reason that if I grew up with a psychopath as a primary caregiver the lack of security in intimate relationships would be my primary concern.

My daughter took the Enneagram test and it turns out she's a type 5. 5w6 to be precise. She told me the description of the type 5 is definitely her and I agree.

I asked her boyfriend to take the test as well and he got Type 6. His second highest on the test was Type 2.

They're going to do the MBTI one sometime tomorrow I think.

Oh I missed a bit. this post isn't needed now

Squaredonutwheels wrote:Interesting how your mentors have two 3's where as the clan seems to be balanced with a little helping of everything except 3's. It gives the impression that the clan isn't achievement focused but having some kind of stable balance as it's core values.
Also you're the only 1 in the clan other than your family.

It’s probably an issue of group culture.

They’re quite a rough and ready bunch with a tendency to be scathing of anything that smells to much of pretence. Katie in particular has a tendency to be downright savage when presented with anything resembling ego fluffing. As a individuals we’re all quite disparate so there isn’t actually a lot to compete over. We’re also not a group which needs to agree with itself either, the ground state seems to be the debate.

The manner of communication tends both backward and harsher than some people are comfortable with. If I’m walking down the street with Doormatt I might turn to him and say in mock exasperation “You know, I f*cking hate you” to which he’d probably grin and say “I know” before going off at a tangent about how it’s his purpose to make me miserable like a short Irish version of poe’s raven. But the whole communication is actually an expression of affection. When I was babysitting his kids over the summer holidays I kept threatening to sell them to an east European sex trafficker, which in actuality was me saying that I’d take care of them and get things organised whenever he expressed anxiety about them (he’s a single parent, this happens a lot). I mean the group will express affection to each other directly in quieter moments, more so than most other groups I’ve encountered, but we’ve been light heartedly insulting and trolling each other since Doormatt, Strange, Lu, Katie and I were at school. It’s probably fairly normal

In some ways I suspect the bickering, trolling and general asshatery is what prevents the various relationships getting stale or disagreements becoming serious.

However a 3 who needs to be viewed in a certain way, a 1 with very fixed opinions on the subject of social interactions or people generally who need others to be ‘nice’ all the time will likely find them abrasive.