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Empath

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Re: Empath

Postby justonemoreperson » Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:09 am

Yeah; it's the receiver's end of empathy, when they don't believe they've received enough or their plight has been overlooked.

Useful, until it becomes something in itself, rather than a tool to elicit a solution. Example:

"I had an idea in work, but no one listened."
"Why not put it in writing and email it to your boss?"
"Good idea; I'll try that."

Compared to:
"I had an idea in work, but no one listened."
"Why not put it in writing and email it to your boss?"
"I doubt that'd work. No one listens to me."
"Isn't it worth a try?"
"What's the point. No one listens; this place is crap..." etc.

At that stage, the amount of empathy requested goes beyond that which the other person should be expected to show and it generates irritation, whereas the first interaction creates an even social contract and is seen by both to be positive.
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Re: Empath

Postby saucygirl31 » Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:28 am

both are kinda annoying but it can be used to create an "us vs. them" mentality to establish trust
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Re: Empath

Postby justonemoreperson » Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:30 am

saucygirl31 wrote:both are kinda annoying but it can be used to create an "us vs. them" mentality to establish trust


True, but there's no end-point; no constructive purpose. It eventually becomes a bunch of housewives in a coffee shop bitching about whoever isn't there.
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Re: Empath

Postby saucygirl31 » Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:33 am

it can turn into that yeah
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Re: Empath

Postby Squaredonutwheels » Sun Jul 07, 2019 11:41 am

Perhaps the solution to problems isn't more solutions. The problem is the problem of needing problems. You can solve it but it doesn't solve it-the person with the problem. Giving solutions isn't the solution to solutions. Creating problems is a solution to expand the person.

Reminds me of the old Yiddish story about the moaning farmer.

It could always be worse - a Yiddish folk tale

Once upon a time in a small village a poor unfortunate man lived with his mother, his wife, and his six children in a little one-room hut. Because they were so crowded, the man and his wife often argued. The children were noisy, and they fought. In winter, when the nights were long and the days were cold, life was especially hard. The hut was full of crying and quarreling. One day, when the poor unfortunate man couldn’t stand it any more, he ran to the Rabbi for advice.

“Holy Rabbi,” he cried, “things are in a bad way with me, and getting worse. We are so poor that my mother, my wife, my six children, and I all live together in one small hut. We are too crowded, and there’s so much noise. Help me, Rabbi. I’ll do whatever you say.”

The Rabbi thought and pulled on his beard. At last he said, “Tell me, my poor man, do you have any animals, perhaps a chicken or two?”

“Yes,” said the man. “I do have a few chickens, also a rooster and a goose.

“Ah, fine,” said the Rabbi. “Now go home and take the chickens, the rooster, and the goose into your hut to live with you.”

“Yes indeed, Rabbi,” said the man, though he was a bit surprised.
The poor unfortunate man hurried home and took the chickens, the rooster, and the goose out of the shed and into his little hut.

When some days or a week had gone by, life in the hut was worse than before. Now with the quarreling and crying there was honking, crowing, and clucking. There were feathers in the soup. The hut stayed just as small and the children grew bigger. When the poor unfortunate man couldn’t stand it any longer, he again ran to the Rabbi for help.

“Holy Rabbi,” he cried, “see what a misfortune has befallen me. Now with the crying and quarreling, with the honking, clucking, and crowing, there are feathers in the soup. Rabbi, it couldn’t be worse. Help me, please.”

The Rabbi listened and thought. At last he said, “Tell me, do you happen to have a goat?”

“Oh, yes, I do have an old goat, but he’s not worth much.”

“Excellent,” said the Rabbi. “Now go home and take the old goat into your hut to live with you.”

“Ah, no! Do you really mean it, Rabbi?” cried the man.

“Come, come now, my good man, and do as I say at once,” said the Rabbi.

The poor unfortunate man tramped back home with his head hanging down and took the goat into his hut.

When some days or a week had gone by, life in the little hut was much worse. Now, with the crying, quarreling, clucking, honking, and crowing, the goat went wild, pushing and butting everyone with his horns. The hut seemed smaller, the children grew bigger.
When the poor unfortunate man couldn’t stand it another minute, he again ran to the Rabbi.

“Holy Rabbi, help me!” he screamed. “Now the goat is running wild. My life is a nightmare.”

The Rabbi listened and thought. At last he said, “Tell me, my poor man. Is it possible that you have a cow? Young or old doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, Rabbi, it’s true I have a cow,” said the poor man fearfully.

“Go home then,” said the Rabbi, “and take the cow into your hut.”

“Oh, no, surely not, Rabbi!” cried the man.

“Do it at once,” said the Rabbi.

The poor unfortunate man trudged home with a heavy heart and took the cow into his hut. Is the Rabbi crazy? he thought.

When some days or a week had gone by, life in the hut was very much worse than before. Everyone quarreled, even the chickens. The goat ran wild. The cow trampled everything. The poor man could hardly believe his misfortune. At last, when he could stand it no longer, he ran to the Rabbi for help.

“Holy Rabbi,” he shrieked, “help me, save me, the end of the world has come! The cow is trampling everything. There is no room even to breathe. It’s worse than a nightmare!”

The Rabbi listened and thought. At last he said, “Go home now, my poor unfortunate man, and let the animals out of your hut.”

“I will, I will, I’ll do it right away,” said the man.

The poor unfortunate man hurried home and let the cow, the goat, the chickens, the goose, and the rooster out of his little hut.
That night the poor man and all his family slept peacefully. There was no crowing, no clucking, no honking. There was plenty of room to breathe.

The very next day the poor man ran back to the Rabbi.

“Holy Rabbi,” he cried, “you have made life sweet for me. With just my family in the hut, it’s so quiet, so roomy, so peaceful… What a pleasure!”

Margot Zemach
It could always be worse
New York, Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 1996


-- Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:43 pm --

Moral of the story; punch your spouse in the mouth and when you stop punching them, they'll stop moaning.

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kidding
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Re: Empath

Postby ArchCannon » Wed Jul 10, 2019 3:56 pm

saucygirl31 wrote:i wonder what ratsht feels like for you

for me I sexualize my failures. i found a way to get off. but once I cum I'm like "fuuuuk that I'm gonna go rule the world again". it's hard to explain


That's nice. Made me laugh lol.
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Re: Empath

Postby Manners73 » Fri Jul 12, 2019 7:18 pm

So is empathy like a load of posh housewives in a coffeeshop moaning about their failures and then masturbating over them?
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Re: Empath

Postby saucygirl31 » Fri Jul 12, 2019 7:22 pm

hahahahahaha idk
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