The mask doesn’t seem to work for me

So where to start? Lol this post is probably going to end up being long but anyway a little back story I’m a female in my mid 20’s that had much success getting what I wanted over the years not wearing much of a mask at all it actually worked for me but all situations are different and I know many people have success wearing a mask
It always seemed the worse I treated men the more I could get out of them the men ranging from regular every day guys to guys I might not label narcissistic but atleast has some narcissistic traits
And I’m not talking about wearing much of a mask even in the beginning
As an example I met an older guy And right away I said hey do you wanna be my sugar daddy and then I would start texting him a list of things I needed and we just went from there the only thing I would consider being somewhat as a mask was me giving good sex in the beginning stages then withholding later but he was the type who liked to prove he didn’t just care about sex lmao so he would deal with me withholding like a trooper
Over the years I got a lot of money and material possessions out of this man and I mean a lot

But later with someone new I experimented with using a mask in a lot of ways that I’ll explain and it ended up being a big waste of time which I will get into more detail about but to sum it up in my short version I feel like if you put somebody in their place early on and you make them feel like all they deserve to be is your servant and all you see in them is someone that deserves to make you happy it goes a lot better.

Ok so for this guy the one where I decided to experiment using a mask , I choose to experiment with him because I knew a lot of information about him and he didn’t know that so I wanted to use it to my advantage
Basically he was the kinda guy in the past that liked to impress people big time and his family had money so he would always blow money on friends and girls etc.. before he was an easy person to use and his family spoiled him that’s where he would get this money from
But over time when he would loose money and friends he stated to get bitter plus his family cut off the cash flow so I did know going in he did not have as much money as he used to but I still wanted to see what I could get him to do
So as my mask I played the good girl that didn’t use men and since I knew he was used to woman treating him bad and he was used to being used in the beginning I treated him nice And the complete opposite of what he was used to....big mistake!
Yes In the beginning stages he was somewhat spoiling me paying for things and expensive dinners but that’s not enough for me I’m used to more
He also was wearing a mask in the beginning he ended up being a big narcissist which I didn’t figure out right away because when I met him he had quit drugs so he was like super lame acting like a goody two shoes and he was always so tired and calm and boring but that proved to be from drug withdrawals because when he started doing drugs again because of me I think he started acting completely different and dropped the mask

But I feel like since I treated him good in the beginning and he’s so used to being used by woman that I set the tone for things to go bad because the rest of the time I was involved with him he was so pressed on keeping the act up that he was some sex magnet that woman loved and that he never gave money to woman but that’s further from the truth
So later on when I started dropping the mask he was very resistant to me and he even stopped doing small things for me because he wanted things to stay the same he wanted me to have this image of him that he was some macho man ugh
In the midst of all of this I actually caught him with another woman but I didn’t care but I acted like I did. Anyway come to find out he actually wanted me to catch him and he started with his triangulation tactics... but this is when he still thinks I’m an empath before I dropped my mask
See that’s where all of this went bad he definitely was a narcissistic thinking he was dealing with an emphatic girl lmao but oh boy does he find out later that’s not true

I don't have much problem maintaining a mask until my temper gets the better of me and it always does. I get mad so fuking easy it annoys me sometimes (I have low frustration tolerance), but I often like the feeling of it too. It feels good to release it on someone. Problem is, the mask is completely gone when that happens and people soon discover the kind of person I really am.

If someone says the word "mask" once more time, i'm going to loose my cool.

You are who you are. Whether it be a chameleon or someone with a more stable identity.

Playing roles is what you're doing.

madness00 wrote:If someone says the word "mask" once more time, i'm going to loose my cool.

You are who you are. Whether it be a chameleon or someone with a more stable identity.

Playing roles is what you're doing.

The MASK is the very definition of playing a roll. It's just a name for the facade being displayed.

If someone is being their true self, then they're not wearing a MASK at all.

I often wear a MASK in real life. Don't you?

Reaper wrote:

madness00 wrote:If someone says the word "mask" once more time, i'm going to loose my cool.

You are who you are. Whether it be a chameleon or someone with a more stable identity.

Playing roles is what you're doing.

The MASK is the very definition of playing a roll. It's just a name for the facade being displayed.

If someone is being their true self, then they're not wearing a MASK at all.

I often wear a MASK in real life. Don't you?

That sounds correct. From what I understand you make a lot of impulsive decisions tho, so how do you have the patience to keep it for so long?

madness00 wrote:If someone says the word "mask" once more time, i'm going to loose my cool.

You are who you are. Whether it be a chameleon or someone with a more stable identity.

Playing roles is what you're doing.

so glad someone said this before me. This whole mask thing is completely idiotic and it sounds much more idiotic compared to people actually thinking it is a thing

madness00 wrote:If someone says the word "mask" once more time, i'm going to loose my cool.

You are who you are. Whether it be a chameleon or someone with a more stable identity.

Playing roles is what you're doing.

This! I can't even take the post seriously.. I just can't see past "mask" lol I want to hand OP a spoon and tell them to go test themselves for Psychopathy.

dobiedobiedoo wrote:

Reaper wrote:The MASK is the very definition of playing a roll. It's just a name for the facade being displayed.

If someone is being their true self, then they're not wearing a MASK at all.

I often wear a MASK in real life. Don't you?

That sounds correct. From what I understand you make a lot of impulsive decisions tho, so how do you have the patience to keep it for so long?

I can only play whatever role I need to play for short periods of time.

As long as I'm not seeing whoever I need to fool regularly I can usually keep it up pretty well for a few weeks at least, but if they're around me a lot then I can barely maintain the mask for long at all. It could slip within a matter of hours or a matter of days. It just depends on what's happening etc. I'm usually pretty good at talking my way out of trouble though, so it hasn't caused me any major problems ...yet anyway.

FormallyZach31 wrote:This whole mask thing is completely idiotic

Why does something so simple bother you so much?

It's just a quicker way of saying "playing a role" or "displaying a facade", and it actually feels like you're wearing a mask in a sense because that's all it is - an act.

It seems idiotic to let a word like that bother you.

Reaper wrote:It's just a quicker way of saying "playing a role" or "displaying a facade", and it actually feels like you're wearing a mask in a sense because that's all it is - an act.

The term grates because it's used to imply there's something special about role-playing and duplicity, when there isn't. Everyone does it, some nons with greater ease than sociopaths.

vcrpamphlet wrote:The term grates because it's used to imply there's something special about role-playing and duplicity, when there isn't.

I don't see how it implies that at all.

Everyone does it, some nons with greater ease than sociopaths.

While I agree that everyone does it to an extent, most nons only wear one at times to blend in - pretend to care when they may not be in the mood to etc.

The main reason a sociopath wears a mask is to manipulate and con people. Of course, it's also used to blend in, but it's primarily used as a tool.