Your Friendships

Do you have a lot of friends? How do you view the idea of friendship?

In comparison to other people, not many. I don't have a lot of need for socializing. A friend is someone I enjoy spending time with.

Have you ever betrayed a friendship for personal gain? Apathy? Any other reason?

Never really had a good occasion to betray a friend, but I think I wouldn't have second thoughts.
But I'm not actively looking to f*ck people over.

It's been said that old friends are the most valuable. Is this something you would agree with?

Nope, my friendships die with time.

Do you believe it's possible to grow apart from acquaintances and friendships? Is this a pattern in your life?

Yes, it always was a pattern in my life. When I get out of given social circle, I don't keep in contact.

I'm incapable of maintaining long-term relationships. And believe me, I've tried.
But despite trying, I still never managed to maintain an interpersonal connection.

I guess I kind of do have friends. Right now there are 2-3 guys I'll chill out with and do stuff with, they talk $#%^ about their lives and confide when stuff is up or down for them.

One said some silly $#%^ when drunk and high like they don't want to lose me as a friend but they don't know if I feel the same way. It's true but I like his company and we have fun. Just don't think the relationship is the same on both sides.

naps wrote:Do you have a lot of friends? How do you view the idea of friendship?

I like it when someone can resemble or extend me. I can talk to them and get accustumed to their prescence just like anybody else, but I don't mind moving on once the story ends.

naps wrote:Have you ever betrayed a friendship for personal gain? Apathy? Any other reason?

I am not sure I understand the question.

naps wrote:It's been said that old friends are the most valuable. Is this something you would agree with?

I sure hope not. I like to develop, which hurts the consistency of my brand, so I often change my environment.

naps wrote:Do you believe it's possible to grow apart from acquaintances and friendships? Is this a pattern in your life?

Like I said before, friends are an extention of the self. That means the time I spent with them is in my memory in some way, influencing how I act. Because of this, anybody and anything you have ever experienced is still inside of you, thus not apart.

Thanks for your replies.

This thread was actually research for a project. I was most interested in answers to the longevity question and was surprised at how many people found little value in long term friendships.

I view friendship as having it's base in a kind of informal, unspoken camaraderie, a mutual respect , and a shared temperament. To me, a friend is someone who makes navigating through life a little easier.

Long term friendships are valuable to me because they are more solid and trustworthy. There's a shared history. I'm not easy to get to know so I value the two long term friendships I have because the work has already been done.

I lack the emotional investment most people put into friendships, but I can appreciate it in a remote way. My older friends understand that, at least to a point where it doesn't drive them away. I'm actually curious to see how I will react emotionally should one of them die. One on them is pretty much asking for it, and I suspect it will hit me significantly, if for no other reason than it will be a loss of history and investment, as well as a reminder that the end is on the horizon for me as well.

Yep, lots of friends. My opinion on friendship is that the lowest the expectations you have from others, the easier it is to make friendships. I have hanged out with people from all walks of life, and can normally find something on everyone that makes hanging out with them enjoyable

that is my problem.i don't consider that as real friends and i see no enjoynment in hanging out with them more.it feels the same with being alone.sure talking to them is interesting but not having them as friends.
but is true. acquaintances with low expectations is easy to have,but i can't find much joy in that anymore.

It's been said that old friends are the most valuable. Is this something you would agree with?
I would say depth or intensity is more important than duration.

i am jealous of quoth with the 11 friend situation.
but i disagree i think duration is too important,it prooves how true is the frienship,
since i had very intense frienships that now i don't speak or know where they are,so i think it was not true frienship now

I find people too fragile to be friends for a long time. There are social contract issues that are, to me, nonsense but seem very important to them.

To that end, after a while I find myself playing with them, mostly unconsciously. My wife will say, "You're doing it again, leave him / her alone."

I get bored with people and I hate social structure. I have some friends who love the whole process and will put out napkins in silver f*cking holders. When they come to our place they get to sit out back next to a fire with a grill on it and they're not quite sure if the meat they're eating is from Tesco or whether I shot it as it ran past. To the extent that the female one stated that it is now a vegetarian.

naps wrote:Do you have a lot of friends? How do you view the idea of friendship?

Have you ever betrayed a friendship for personal gain? Apathy? Any other reason?

It's been said that old friends are the most valuable. Is this something you would agree with?

Do you believe it's possible to grow apart from acquaintances and friendships? Is this a pattern in your life?

I do not have a lot of friends.

I have betrayed people for personal gain but I do have empathy, a example is that you know that nothing keeps on going to the end of your life. Nothing more than yourself.

Old friends can be bad, old friends you are grown apart from. If its a good friend there is value but thats the same with everything, new or old.

Thats a part of life.

I have a crap ton of “friends,” but I consider them to be acquaintances. I talk to them when I need them and I don’t really care what happens in their lives unless it threatens to hurt their availability to satisfy my needs. When I get bored and I don’t feel like playing card games or partying and finding new people, RARE, I call on them and they’re always happy to hang out with me, even though I never even think about them until I need them. I don’t even tell them happy birthday when it’s their birthday. Wow, I just realized I’m the worst friend who has ever existed and I am actually okay with it because if it were any other way, it would be way too much work and I wouldn’t even have acquaintances. I much rather fly solo.

I don't keep friends...I have people who I like but I am naturally a solitary person.

Have you ever betrayed a friendship for personal gain? Apathy? Any other reason?

I thought about why I could not answer the question earlier. I suppose that I do not believe that any of my behavior qualifies as betrayal because I know that my actions have had very good reasons.