What should I do?

I am at the moment an in-patient in a psych clinic in a hospital. I came here after a suicide attempt and when I was still very much psychotic. The visual hallucinations which were the worst are gone now, but I still hear acoustic hallucinations or voices. I've been lying about this to psych. nurses and my entire family for the past 4 months. It's totally exhausting to keep this act up. Making some jokes here and there to get a good impression and more freedoms from my psych. Everyone thinks i''m doing so much better, but it's only half true.

The big thing is this. The court came and gave my a 'rm' which is the court saying that if i'm psychotic they can keep me there for 6 months. And I don't doubt they can make it longer. What do you think the psych and the nurses would do if I told them the truth (that i'm hearing terrible voices all day long and lied to them all the time acting like i'm well). I'm deathly affraid of staying here another 6 months. The voices won't go away after taking 3 different meds and I just knew that it wouldn't work right from the start.

What to do... what to do... Tell my family? Sister? The psych and nurses? Mentally this is too heavy really...

Hey,

I understand the uncertainty that you're under... ...I was an in-patient many years ago and also feared that if I told the truth, then they'd keep me in 'there' for much longer than I actually stayed. I admitted myself to the place, and was therefore able to discharge myself too. Did you self-admit or were you 'forced' in?

In the ideal world, you would tell the psych the truth about what is in your mind and then you'd get treated rapidly. If you don't tell the truth, then maybe you won't get out soon because they won't figure out what is wrong with you and would rather keep you in there until they do [figure out]. So, if you can, accept in your mind that you need this break right now, tell the psych the truth, and then be very proactive about getting better. 'Psychotic' individuals acn exist in the world, working and living just like everyone else. You have to prove to your psych and everyone else that you can do this.

Kevin