Meds for life

I have been pills since 13. I have taken so many pills in my life, which makes me wonder, what have they done to me? My appearance, my brain, everything. I don't know if it's possible, but I think they may have stunted my growth. Stopped growing after 7th, 8th grade. Depakote made hair fall out. I know for a fact they make me slower. Cause diahreah. Weight gain. I'm sick of taking all these meds every single night. I want to feel alive again. I'm trying to work with my pdoc with coming off the anti-psychotics and we are slowly tapering trilafon and I'm only on 1mg. But, when I asked about coming off saphris she said that's what holds everything together. I was never on anti-psychotics until my second manic episode. I don't think I need them. I don't have hallucinations. I feel like they just throw them at you in the hospital because they basically shut down your thoughts, put you to sleep and make you not care about anything. Its like a quick fix for them.
I want to find alternatives. I'm willing to try anything. Diet, mindfulness,exercise.. Anything organic. I don't really live in a progressive area. I want to find holistic doctors. Unfortunately, insurance doesn't cover them. I don't plan on relying on meds the rest of my life.

What do you do if pdocs aren't willing to work with you?

Last time I tapered off my meds it didn't end to well. Though, I feel I wasn't living right and wasn't taking the right approach. I was using alcohol and smoked pot a couple times. One of them through my mind off. I'm not going to come off them again without assistance.

My main problem is sleep. Whenever my sleep goes off, I become hypomanic, which soon enough turns into mania.

I know mania is serious.. I guess I just don't think of it as severe as the pdocs. Though success stories seem rare, I have found many people who have found ways to live without medication.
It's not mainstream.

Bit of rant.. Just tired of sleeping 12 hours a day, feeling the same grey, dull, joyless feeling every day. I have glimpses of feeling good, like coffee and breakfast, a sunny morning. Playing basketball at night.

How do you cope? Anybody med-free after being diagnosed?

I'm sorry for all these troubles you've faced.
If your pdoc is not willing to take into consideration your wishes and how you want YOUR treatment done, i'd suggest finding someone who is willing to compromise. The problem with doctors is that they do in fact know a lot, usually, and often believe they know better than you even though you are the one suffering through your symptoms and side effects.

If you really do want to come off of medication completely, it's going to be a very slow process. I know of alternatives that help people even immersed in psychosis live without medication or very, very low, helpful doses. Like you said, it's not very mainstream. Certain cognitive therapies and sometimes supplements (but i'd recommend extensive research on supplements before taking them, they can be just as bad as prescription medications) help as long as they are taken at the same time. Psychotherapy is a lot more helpful than people give it credit for, it can help you learn your triggers and other instances in life that may exacerbate your condition. Like i said, alternative methods are pretty slow working and you have to stick with them for a long time in order to see any improvement, that's a good reason medication is so prevalent.

It's a little worrisome to know you've been taking medications since 13, that certainly changes brain chemistry. Sometimes it can make things worse than they really are. Regardless, it's not too late to give alternatives a try. I've tried medication once in my life and have jumped around with diagnoses without ever coming to a true consensus. I've never had full blown mania, but hypomania yes and some pretty deep depressive episodes, some weird paranoia, and heavy anxiety. I'm not in treatment right now. I want to get back into it, but have decided not to accept medication offers or recommendations. That's not for everyone thought. It sounds like your side effects are causing you the most trouble. It's also not too late to find a medication combination that works. I know you said you've taken so many before and that you're sick of them, but you could find that one miracle one; stranger things have happened.

Yes, It is worrisome that I had to take a drugs since 13. I know it has effected my brain chemistry. From 13-18 I was only on small amount of depakote. Then my second manic episode they added lamictal and antipsychotic. I would like to try psychotherapy if I can find it and afford it. I think it's possible to reprogram. I'm still only 24. To feel better is always my concern. I want to better myself. I know my triggers. I'm a positive person. I have bought into the "take your meds and you will be fine".. yet, still had relapses. Even, if I could just stay on only one mood stabalizer which is lamictal, I think I would feel better. It's the antipsychotics that are just completely mind numbing.

Depakote also made my hair fall out.

Risperidone gave me bitch tits and no ejaculate ( both problems went away after stopping it).

Geondone. I was in bed 18 hours (I think I may be allergic to something the pills themselves are made out of, in addition to the sedating effect).

I could go on....


___

Personally, I view pdocs as advisers. They work for me, in my mind, and the slightest hint of them being controlling or dismissive, I fire them. My insurance allows for me to request different doctors for whatever reason. If possible, just keep looking.

I have an experience with this, and have researched this.

The drugs make you feel like crap, and when you stop them all at once, you suddenly feel so much better that you are high as a kite. It is normal to be extremely enthusiastic and cheer, even doing stupid things, because of how much better you feel.

The solution is to reduce the dose gradually, in small steps, so that the difference is not that big. If you reduce your dose just a bit, you will feel that bit better. The best approach is to reduce by mg, or to split the pill into 4 quarters and take 3 quarters only. After getting used to the lower dose, decrease it again (half a pill only). Later again, just one quarter of the pill. If that will be possible, experiment with reducing your dose gradually until you are "weened off".

Once again, being high after suddenly stopping the drug is normal [because the drug made you feel like crap and you are without it feeling so good that you are extremely enthusiastic and happy.]

Other than that, the drug has no medical qualities. It is only a chemical restraint. It makes you disabled to protect the safety of others.

neuroleptic drugs do act as chemical restraints, and that is the main use to which they are put
in psychiatric practice. It is time that we as a society come to terms with the reality that
these drugs are not medications in any ordinary sense of the term. They are chemical restraints
with no medical qualities whatsoever. The travesty of hiding these procedures in the guise of
"necessary medical intervention" needs to be exposed and brought to an end.
http://www.madinamerica.com/2014/07/use ... estraints/

I won't reduce my meds without pdocs assistance and without alternative options.

*mod edit* Good luck putting your health in sneaky snake oil's hands. They will only BS you with rhetoric, poison you with toxic chemical restraints, and make you inferior in every discussion, forever, and via labeling because that is how rhetoric is used...

Since they are not based in medicine and science, but in rhetoric, machiavellianism, Sophism, you are dealing with the worst scum, much more greedy and more evil than bad politicians or bad managers.

That said, who does not find reliable, safe, truthful information to manage his health himself is condemned to be tricked and fooled, marginalized and slandered, health damages, by hands of quacks

Good luck convincing quacks to do for you what you really need, instead of what they need (filling beds for profit, prescribing drugs for profit, giving labels for power, using deceptive rhetoric for money and power, etc.) Helping somebody does not fit into their job duties. They only help themselves or others such as your family, your friends, and specifically they help them from you by disabling you...

I'm not to fond of my psychiatrist. But, my p.a. really seems to care about my well-being. She has finally let me come off trillafon.

quackery wrote:*mod edit* Good luck putting your health in sneaky snake oil's hands. They will only BS you with rhetoric, poison you with toxic chemical restraints, and make you inferior in every discussion, forever, and via labeling because that is how rhetoric is used...


Good luck convincing quacks to do for you what you really need, instead of what they need (filling beds for profit, prescribing drugs for profit, giving labels for power, using deceptive rhetoric for money and power, etc.) Helping somebody does not fit into their job duties. They only help themselves or others such as your family, your friends, and specifically they help them from you by disabling you...

I think your opinions very biased. They don't all just care about money. Many of them, yes. But, alot of them go into the field because they generally care about people. Maybe, it's not a rEAl science, but meds do help many people. How do schizofrenics deal with voices/hallucinations? It must be pretty hard without certain meds.

To the contrary, they do effect MANY people in a negative way. Such as perscribing anti-deppresents after a 10 minute appoitment, which triggers a manic episode. Or keeping somebody on anti-psychotics after a single traumatic event. Perscribing benzos just because somebody is a little anxious, which leads to addiction.

Christopher2045 wrote:
Last time I tapered off my meds it didn't end to well. Though, I feel I wasn't living right and wasn't taking the right approach. I was using alcohol and smoked pot a couple times. One of them through my mind off. I'm not going to come off them again without assistance.

My main problem is sleep. Whenever my sleep goes off, I become hypomanic, which soon enough turns into mania.

Ever try Seroquel for sleep ? The trick I found was to only take it as needed and in the smallest dose it takes to get to sleep.

I know what you mean with hypo-manic turning to mania , I used to call that getting "too tired to rest" or too tired to sleep. Then drink to try to try and chill. I drank myself all the way to hospital the very last time and they tried putting me on a ton of pills for "bipolar".

One of the reasons I put up a fight refusing all those make you a flat zombie drugs in the hospital is because I knew if I was compliant when I left and then quit that zombie all day crap like I knew I would I would have REBOUND INSOMNIA and other withdrawal reactions and have to taper or get sick AGAIN ! I even got threatened with a needle but continued to refuse cause I figured out that's how they keep you sick and F that.

The reason I started taking pills and got caught up in psychiatry in the first place was insomnia. That was my first complaint that lead to years of psych med hell. I knew nothing about tolerance and withdrawal or addiction or dependence. But thanks to psychiatry I learned about that hell.


Anyway half a Seroquel 25mg tab puts me to sleep if I need it and doesn't make me zombie the next day. I have a just in case stash of it from doctor for insomnia.

Melatonin will also put me to sleep but I have been recovered for years now, in the beginning no way it would have.

@Christopher2045

I want to find alternatives. I'm willing to try anything. Diet, mindfulness,exercise..

If you want to come off of medication you need to be ready that you will have to remove the symptoms himself instead of having to take pills.
That is, they are not going anywhere, and you have referred to them as to the variant of your normal state of health. And you have to switch on your brains and not to do anything stupids.
This will not always be easy.
And you will need to learn to relax. All these states arise from a strong inner tension.
You don't notice these stresses but they are there. Pay attention to the tensions of the muscles of the face and head. Close your eyes and track these stresses. And then try to relax.
Excuse me for my English