Sister suffering from anorexia, need advice/support

My youngest sister has been suffering from an eating disorder for approximately a year. Since last January she lost a radical amount of weight due to which she started getting seeing regularly doctor,a nutritional specialist and a psychologist. For the past 3 months she has weighed the same, even though she has "supposedly" followed her new diet plan designed by the nutritionist.

She looks absolutely terrible, like a cancer patient and has stated that she would like to get better and back to "normal". Sadly, food domiantes EVERYTHING she does (she tries to hide stuff by telling my mom of starting a cooking course, is constantly baking stuff that she never eats, "cooks" the meals her nutritionist has assigned her)

I would like to hear from former (recovering ones are also welcome ) anorexia suffererers on how YOU got cured. Did you do make your own food or did someone else make it for you? How bad does one's case need to be to be sent to a clinic?

I feel she's looking worse day by day, and there's just so many lies which is really tearing the family apart. I'd greatly appreciate any help or advice in this matter!

calypsso wrote:Did you do make your own food or did someone else make it for you? How bad does one's case need to be to be sent to a clinic?

I had to give up all control of my food to someone else. That meant letting someone else prepare and serve the food, and plan the menu. The only thing I had to struggle with was getting through the fear of eating because the burden of the rest was taken away from me.

If the psychologist still thinks she's ok to be outside of hospital then that's a bit encouraging. If her vital signs start showing signs of distress and/or her electrolytes or nutrition is causing health problems then that's usually when a doctor will push for hospitalization. It's different in each case and different hospitals & doctors have different rules.

The disorder is really powerful and will cause her to lie. It needs her to do this in order to keep going.

I'm sorry that your family is suffering so much because of anorexia. It's really hard on people who care because it causes a feeling of hopelessness. There is hope though and many people do recover.

Thank you so much for your reply! The thought has constantly crossed my mind that she should not be preparing her own food.

What about regarding food in general? Did you completely surrender preparing (even general preparing like baking or such) etc to someone else?
She has her birthday party tomorrow and wants to bake there all sorts of things and generally make all the food etc, but I'm not sure that's a good idea as it seems to keep on feeding her obsession over food.

Thank you again for your words of hope!

Yes, I had to surrender everything, even shopping for the food. If I was given the chance to obsess over anything related to food, it was taking away time & energy to address the root problems.

It's not uncommon for an anorexic to make lots of food and bake sweets for other people but avoid eating it themselves. Family members usually find this reassuring because at least their loved one is ok being around food. It's just a ruse to get people to stop worrying so much. There's a chance she's also doing this in part to torment herself more - prove that she's strong enough to bake all those goodies but not eat any of it.

I will tell you this, as somebody who has anorexia and bulimic tendencies, and who C&S that your sister may not have hit that all time low yet. That's when a person is ready to actually recover. I do want to recover from my e.d's, but right now, I honestly don't feel like I am ready. I do see a psychologist, and my family is unaware of my eating habits, although they do force me to eat something every day.

I would try and be careful with body-imgages around her, though. You and your family need to show more body positive things to her. Show her that you find her beautiful and want her to get better, and show her that everything will be alright. But that she needs to take the first steps. Right now, she needs you and your family's support, and I can see that she is getting it. And if it's possible, see if you can make some kind of deals with her, such as "If you eat this full meal and keep it in, then you can do (something she would like to do or not want to do).

I do hope your sister can recover. Anorexia is a very scary thing.