EDNOS? pls reply

So, i was never diagnosed with an eating disorder because i refused to go to therapy or talk to anyone about it other than people online like tumblr and my friend who suffered with anorexia (and now bulimia).

It began in 9th grade, i just started fasting so ######6 much, i blame my ADD pills. They took my appetite away ( i stopped taking them and i did fasts by myself)and i have ALWAYS hated my body. I'd purge a couple of times a week and constantly pass out in the shower. I was self harming at the time and i had been for over a year (now ive been clean for 5 months). SO basically i was so ######6 depressed and i lost a lot of weight however i neevr got underweight, ive always been fat and i still am. My 11th grade year i was very depressed more than before (possibly) i began cutting more but i was forced to eat more and i gained a lot of weight very fast. However, my senior year i got more into drugs...

I'd starve myself but not on purpose, im so confused however. I had an eating disorder and its gone. Food was all i thought about for so long, im just so confused. How did I recover by myself? Or will it come back?

Why is this confusion distressing for you? Is there any reason to know why your eating disorder passed?

Why does it matter?

Is ADHD a significant issue for you? Both ADHDers and ASDers are known to get tangled up in confusion and be distressed by it. As a comorbid ADHD & ASD person, I can attest to this! My ADHD sister also.

Benzpheta, I am not completely sure if you recovered. I am not saying this to make you desperate, but it is quite common that one - unwillingly - "substitutes" the eating disorder with some other kind of maladaptive behaviour. (For me, it was drinking that came to replace my food restriction/food avoidance symptoms.)

How are you doing now? Are you able to eat in a relatively okay way? How is it going with those issues which are typical for ED-ed individuals - think of self-image, boundaries, impulse control, perfectionism-related questions and so on?

Stay strong and safe, anyway.