Not sure if this is the right place (trigger warning)

When I was a teenager I had a bad problem with anorexia, I was hospitalized for it. I finally began to eat again and I became belemic. Now I am 30 and my system is all screwed up. There are times where I will go days and eat very little where every thing feels extremely heavy on my stomach and other time I engage in binge eating until I throw it all up.

I am now extremely over weight *edit* and in the worst health of my life. Are these things connected? Can this kind of spiking in weight and then going too low in weight make it hard to lose weight? Have a messed my body up too badly to have a healthy weight and lifestyle or do I still have hope of getting the body and quality of life I want?

You still have an eating disorder. You probably stopped getting therapy treament way before you were actually better psychologically. Probably the same underlying problems you had when younger are still there. I think there is always hope. You need to work with some professionals.

Probably a therapist in eating disorders, and someone to support you with your diet and exercise plan. Sometimes hospitals have public programs in this area.

I am sorry how hard its been for you. I can sympathise. I'm currently somewhat overweight myself and it pisses me off a lot. I"m soon to go on a cycling journey and i hope i can get my weight going down down down again. And my fitness going up up and up again.

I love to travel on a bicycle. Another thing that can help is to get a job that requires a lot of physical activity such as cleaning or gardening. There are probably others too.

Hi FTMIsaacs,

It's never too late to start working toward getting healthy again! Your body will need a period of time to adjust to the new routines. I think that working with a dietician who can make a meal plan with you can be something you look into. It's really easy to get stuck in the restrict/binge/purge cycle. It'll harm your metabolism, making it hard to stay at a healthy weight and usually physical health has a connection to it. Personally, I find it messes with my energy levels, making it harder to get into healthy habits like exercise or self-care. That causes more gain and it becomes a vicious cycle.

Do you still have a treatment team or access to services for people with eating disorders?

Welcome to the forum!