Snapping at my kids

I have fought with depression since I can remember. It got really bad in 4th grade and has just gotten worse over the years. I feel sad most of the time with short bursts of happiness. I feel very guilty for being sad and feeling lonely because I have a wonderful husband and two beautiful children. My problem is I can't seem to control my anger. I yell at my family and I take most of my anger out on my husband. My son who is almost 4 is acting out and I think part of it has to do with how he sees my husband and I fighting all the time. I don't know what to do. I saw a therapist for a while but didn't feel I was getting anywhere. I'm not sure if I need to be on an antidepressant or if there is another answer. I know there is no magic cure but I feel desperate. That's why I'm here.

I understand your depression. I've suffered from depression ever since my father passed away when I was 11. These days I rarely feel uninterrupted neutral or happy days. I'm never really happy because things from a day or ten years ago still piss me off now and I can't control my thoughts to get my mind off of negative, anger inducing memories. I am seeking therapy. My first session is tomorrow.

I think what might help you is finding the source of your anger. The source of my anger and depression is over the course of my life I have felt abused, belittled, degraded, and neglected by family members, people I use to go to school with and former coworkers. Out of the three groups of individuals mentioned only one is suppose to really care about how I feel and they don't. The way my family members and strangers have treated me has really angered me over the last year especially. I had a recent arrest due to my lack of self-control because of my anger and I want to get it worked out so it will never happen again. Find what's bothering you and work out a way to resolve that hurt, anger, or sadness.