What do I do?

I'm a female, 21, in a great relationship but I always seem to start arguements and take things out of context and shout, and scream, panic attacks, even if its just something slightly insensitive that my boyfriend has said to me. There is an age gap in our relationship so i'm not sure if the frequent arguements are to do with me or the gap. In the past I have lost my temper with people near me, i threaten and try and hurt myself in front of them to make them help me and care (thats why I think i do it). With my Mum i can get very angry at her sometimes and frustrated. I use to blame these people until recently i discovered it was me. I'm scared and i'm hating myself everytime it happens. My boyf puts up with so much $#%^ and i tell him 'it will never happen again' and it does. I need to prove to him that i want this sorted. I feel so sad the day after and also my anger is sometimes sparked by alcohol but not always. So what does anyone advise me to do? Do support classes exist for anger management? Do i have to pay? Or would one to one therapy be better. Can anyone relate? In much need of advice.
Thanks xx

I dont really know much you can do sorry but here some things i would try/recomened i hope they come in use.

Try distracting your mind, try to always be doing something so thatyou are less likely to get into a arguement.
Talk to your boyfriend/family/friends if you already havint about this tell them you want to stop and you want help/advice, it will be hard but i bet you can do it!
If alcohol sometimes sparkes it try to drink it less.
The old trick you can try is counting to 10 backwards slowly. Or maybe saying the abc's backwards(its hard and might distract your mind from the argument or what evers upsetting you)
The thing is; is when you start a argument you most likely wont remember to count bacwards/say the abc's backwards.
I dont know if you have to pay for all anger managment classes, but maybe you can get a few for free call the places and ask call phychatrists and ask.
You can always use the internet and look up anger management tips etc.
here are a few websites that might help(hopefully they do)
http://www.thehappyguy.com/anger-management-tips.html
http://www.leadersinstitute.com/resourc ... kills.html
http://www.sedona.com/html/anger-management.aspx

good luck

When anger kills, it is often when anger is ignored over a long course of time. When a person is angry and has the inability to address his or her anger without erupting then we know we have a problem that requires urgent attention.

A person will often use alcohol or drugs to relieve the symptoms if he or she is dealing with anger issues. This is not true in all cases, but alcohol and drugs only ignite the fire already burning out of control.

Anger is rooted from hate, and often the person with problems has difficulty restraining his or her impulses, emotions or desires. The person often acts out on impulse striking at the source that made him or her angry. Not everyone kills when anger is an issue, however in some cases, it has happen and it will happen again.

Self Talk

Some strategies for addressing anger are self-talk. When you feel that you are losing control you might want to ask yourself what is going on inside your mind? You may want to ask yourself if the anger is caused by now, or is it anger that was built inside for years.

You will begin analyzing after you learn self-talk strategies. This means that if you talk yourself through the anger you may see the problem in front of you and find a way to deal with the problem.


anger-management