Alcohol abuse relapse (triggers?)

Hi,

I'm a little worried about posting this because I don't want to trod on anyone's beliefs or experiences. I abused alcohol for about 4 years until I went into rehab and got my act together. My problem wasn't with dependency, but rather what I used alcohol for. After staying completely sober for 6 months I decided I was ready to drink on occasion. For the last 2 years I have managed to do this successfully and I rarely drink anymore.

I tried AA for a while but it didn't work for me, mainly because I didn't identify with the principles. I understand AA is probably a great form of support for other people, but the only thing that worked for me was gathering enough strength and willpower to stop myself from drink.

Recently things in my life have been turned upside down and I find myself again, drinking every day, with the sole purpose of forgetting.

I need to stop this cycle but I know the only way for me to do this successfully is to gain the strength that I need. At the moment, I don't have that.

How do I muster up the courage to continue on without alcohol abuse? Are there any other coping mechanisms people use to help them stop the abuse?

Sorry for the long post and thank you in advance for any responses that I get.

Hi R91,

R91 wrote:How do I muster up the courage to continue on without alcohol abuse? Are there any other coping mechanisms people use to help them stop the abuse?

I know you don't believe in the AA principles, but there really is some wisdom is taking everything just one day at a time. That's how I got through most of my darkest days while trying to sober up from substance abuse.

As for coping mechanisms, there are things you can try under the umbrella of relapse prevention. The acronym:

H ungry
A ngry
L onely
T ired

is very helpful to keep in mind. When you start to feel one or several of these, it's time to do some self-care so the temptation to drink isn't as severe.

Self-care is many things. Eating right, making sure you get enough rest, exercise, getting enough sunshine, keeping in touch with friends and family, engaging in pleasurable activities, etc. This ensures that your life stays in balance.

If you know your triggers, like a place you usually drink at, or a type of drink you cannot yourself around... avoid them.

You mention wanting to forget. That sounds like something you need to eventually face, but hopefully with a therapist who deals with traumas. As long as that urge to forget is still there, you are at risk of drinking.

Take care, and I hope today was a bit better for you than yesterday.

R91 wrote:Hi,


1)I tried AA for a while but it didn't work for me, mainly because I didn't identify with the principles. I understand AA is probably a great form of support for other people,
2)but the only thing that worked for me was gathering enough strength and willpower to stop myself from drink.

3)Recently things in my life have been turned upside down and I find myself again, drinking every day, with the sole purpose of forgetting.

4)I need to stop this cycle but I know the only way for me to do this successfully is to gain the strength that I need. At the moment, I don't have that.

5) How do I muster up the courage to continue on without alcohol abuse? Are there any other coping mechanisms people use to help them stop the abuse?

Sorry for the long post and thank you in advance for any responses that I get.

Hi R91, thanks for your post. I hope you don't mind, but I would like to respond to each point you raise in order.
1) When I hear the words I tried AA and it didn't work for me it usually means someone has gone to a few meetings and decided it wasn't for them. That is not the same as trying AA. AA has 12 steps that lead to a spiritual awakening and through that recovery from alcoholism. It is very rare for a real alcoholic who takes those steps to the best of their ability, not to recover. AA is more than great support for some people, it is far and away the most successful treatment for alcoholism ever, bar none. Its successes number in the millions. If it didn't work for you perhaps you are not alcoholic and don't need what AA offers, or perhaps you just weren't ready ... yet.
2) From the AA Big Book, "all of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals,- usually brief- were inevitably followed by still less control, which lead in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralisation. We are convinced to a man that we are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerabl period we get worse, never better".
3) From the same book " We have tried every imaginable remedy. In some instances there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse.
4)That may be (possible) for certain non-alcoholic people who, though drinking foolishly and heavily at the present time, are able to stop or moderate because their brains and bodies have not been damaged as ours were. But the actual or potential alcoholic, with hardly an exception, will be absolutely unable to stop on the basis of self-knowledge. This is a point we wish to emphasize and re-emphasize, to smash home upon out alcoholic readers as it has been revealed to us out of bitter experience.
5) Lack of power, that was out dilemna. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a power greater than ourselves. Obviously. Well, that is exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a power greater than yourself, which will solve your problem.

My friend, I would like to be able to tell that if you go to this place they will fix it for you, or if you go there and pay the fee, your problem will be removed, or if you move to a different town or avoid certain people, or if you exercise regularly and think only pious thoughts your problems will dissappear, but it wouldnt be truthful. If you are like me, you may be suffering from an illness which only spiritual awakening will cure. If there was a way round that fact I can assure you I would have found it.
God bless,
Mike H.

ladyswan wrote:Hi R91,

R91 wrote:How do I muster up the courage to continue on without alcohol abuse? Are there any other coping mechanisms people use to help them stop the abuse?

I know you don't believe in the AA principles, but there really is some wisdom is taking everything just one day at a time. That's how I got through most of my darkest days while trying to sober up from substance abuse.

As for coping mechanisms, there are things you can try under the umbrella of relapse prevention. The acronym:

H ungry
A ngry
L onely
T ired

Thank you very much for reminding me of this! I used to use it for overeating and self harm but never considered using it for alcohol abuse.

You're awesome, thanks!

-- Tue Mar 20, 2012 3:29 am --

Mikeholi wrote:

R91 wrote:
Hi R91, thanks for your post. I hope you don't mind, but I would like to respond to each point you raise in order....

Hi Mike,

Thank you for such a detailed and supportive reply. I read it very carefully and will re-read it again (and again!) and decide the best course of action for me at this time. I will keep an open mind to AA.

Take care

Well said R91, the best thing you can do is keep an open mind:)
All the best,
Mike.

The rehab centers will help to those people who are addicted of any drugs and alcohol. If any person say to use alcohol and drug then you will be stay on your decision that you will never abuse again alcohol and any drug otherwise you will again use those addictions.

The treatment I did was not really detox, just substance abuse partial hospitalization program. I identified some of my triggers when I did therapy there. I have no relapsed in a while now and have no urge to, but I think dissolved relationships in particular could lead me to relapse, and since I know how bad alcohol is for me now it would not be to self medicate, it would be just a self damaging behavior out of frustration.