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alcohol reduces self-control. Chances are, when he gets that wasted he is no longer able to control the suppressed rage that he lives with. This does not make him any less of an alcoholic. At the very least, AA meetings will help his self-control.

I've been in AA for many years. Many of us recovering alcoholics, especially myself, can turn into monsters when we start drinking. Maybe we would do OK in life if we did not drink, but we like to drink--can't not drink without help. Some of us do have severe mental problems, but we are also alcoholic. One does not always get just one problem--ADD or alcoholic or bipolar, etc. I'm all of those things. But somehow by attending AA I can control and manage all of my problems.

Jim S

Perhaps he drinks to cover the fact that he has another problem? I've learnt that with alot of alcoholics. And because they are trying to hide another problem with alcohol, they become addicted.

My Grandfather was an alcoholic, and he drank and drank and drank to disguise his depression, which eventually lead him into a mental institution. One of my Aunts and my Uncle are both alcoholics too now.

Hi. To the original poster, I've wondered the exact same thing about my alcoholic brother. For years (long before I knew about the alcohol) I have suspected that he could be bipolar. And he certainly seemed to have some unusual anger issues as a child. The drunken episodes in which he turned into a monster after moving back in with my parents a few years ago are what led us all to believe he is an alcoholic. My dear husband thinks that because we suggested he has a problem with alcohol, he jumped on that as if "yeah, that's my problem, that's what I need help with". We've since figured out he also has a problem with abusing prescription and over the counter drugs. I do still think he is an alcoholic/addict, but that he has a lot of other issues that need dealt with. I truly feel that at this point simply stopping the use and abuse of alcohol won't begin to fix a lot of his issues.

If your ex and his "alcoholic" friend have been friends since childhood and your ex recently let the friend move in with him...this very well could be my brother. Or simply another tormented soul with the same sad story.

~JSOI

Hi. To the original poster, I've wondered the exact same thing about my alcoholic brother. For years (long before I knew about the alcohol) I have suspected that he could be bipolar. And he certainly seemed to have some unusual anger issues as a child. The drunken episodes in which he turned into a monster after moving back in with my parents a few years ago are what led us all to believe he is an alcoholic. My dear husband thinks that because we suggested he has a problem with alcohol, he jumped on that as if "yeah, that's my problem, that's what I need help with". We've since figured out he also has a problem with abusing prescription and over the counter drugs. I do still think he is an alcoholic/addict, but that he has a lot of other issues that need dealt with. I truly feel that at this point simply stopping the use and abuse of alcohol won't begin to fix a lot of his issues.

If your ex and his "alcoholic" friend have been friends since childhood and your ex recently let the friend move in with him...this very well could be my brother. Or simply another tormented soul with the same sad story.

~JSOI