New member, seeking advice.

So, after an exhaustive search for self help groups and meetings, I've landed here. This seems like the perfect forum to ask a rather straightforward, but hard to find question. I've always had a problem with alcohol. It runs in my family. It essentially killed my mother. Honestly, I'm drinking a 40 while I write this. I've been on a bender for at least 4 or 5 months now. I'm talking 6+ drinks every day. I go into work drunk, drive drunk, the usual. It's seriously affecting my relationships with my family and everyone around me. On top of that I have bipolar disorder, compounding everything further. My meds don't work almost certainly because of this. I drink to distract myself from daily life, my current situation in life, and my past. I can't stop. After that beautiful sob story -_-, finally we come to the advice I seek. I need help, desperately. I cannot afford, nor am able to attend any sort of rehab. I've looked into the Secular Organizations for Sobriety, however the nearest meetings are over an hour away. The only local organizations are your typical AA/12 step programs. They have the whole "spiritual awakening," praying, etc. angle. Now I'm not anti-religion by any means, however I am in no way "spiritual." This automatically turns me off from these organizations, I know myself and I know I will certainly go into any meeting with a "f___ this, no gods, no masters" mentality, and will shrug it off as a religious organization trying to get me to see the light. Do any of you know of a program of any sort that may be widespread, or at least accessible and somewhat affective that doesn't have the spiritual trappings described above? Or at very least some sort of advice? I'm desperate at this point. Forgive me for the novel, but, as any teenager can attest to, no one I can talk to truly understands my plight. Thank you, truly, anybody who has had the patience to read my tl;dr "cry for help," and especially anyone who may respond.

Hi,

I would recommend you give NA a try. Alcohol is considered one of the drugs, and members aren't going to ask you what you used. I am a member of NA and alcohol was my drug of choice.

AA has been built with a lot of Catholic guilt included. When they talk about God, it mostly is, unfortunately, the Catholic god. NA literature has been written from scratch, and uses either phrases "God as we understood him" or "Higher Power". You can pick anything you like as Higher Power. Here in the Netherlands where I live most people are atheists/agnostics. But the only thing that is required of your HP is that it is stronger than you. Which is why lots of people choose the group they attend as HP -- a group is stronger than one person. Some pick Mother Nature. One person I know picked hurricanes -- they definitely are stronger than one person. Some pick some sort of religion. It doesn't matter. And you can begin your recovery without picking any Higher Power/God/whatever. The third step only goes as far as "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him". Not understanding him also counts. And first two steps don't require you to do anything spiritual.

From my experience, which you can believe or not, people tend to discover a spiritual side to themselves once they stop using or drinking. Spiritual does not mean religious. But you might find that meditation or yoga suddenly work for you, which they never did.

If all I said made you roll your eyes really hard, here's another option: http://www.sossobriety.org/12steps.htm

For full transparency: I believe in a certain set of deities. I do not participate in organised religion of any sort. I very rarely speak about my beliefs at the meeting, and when I do, nobody questions me or tries to change them.

If you have any questions, ask them here or PM me, I'll be glad to help.

Big hugs! (12 Steps meetings of all sorts are big on hugs and I'm no exception. Free hugs!!!)

Have you researched SMART?
Even if they don't end up having a group near you, they can be Really helpful. I used them to get sober through their message boards and forums. In those first sober days I spent a LOT of time on there. They had stuff set up for daily check in's etc. as well as live chat rooms. Even if they don't have meetings near you, it cant hurt to check it out! AA is not the only way~

Have you ever heard of DRA or DDA. I don't know if they have any in your area but it is for alcoholics with a mental illness.
AA is much less religious in practice than you think. Many AA's are agnostic or atheists. The appendix in the book Alcoholics Anonymous states:
By spiritual awakening they mean a more positive attitude towards life and other people.
I hope you find some help somewhere as you are in extreme danger from drinking so heavily while being treated for Bi-Polar disorder.

-- Sat May 02, 2015 3:09 am --

BTW, I just checked and there are NA meetings online.