Another Year coping and Adjusting to this form of Anxiety

I'm on an empty bus , sitting midway and the bus driver way up in the front of course driving .
I place my headphones in my ear listen to music ,more stops and turns and noise I hears making me feel more anxious especially when people are getting on the bus. I get a sharp pain on my back and my heart speed faster with a pain in my arm.


I take my headphones off , pause the music then turn it off and look around breathing in and out . THinking everything is fine bc no one is paying any attention to me everyone is looking normal to the head of the bus ,on the phone ,sleeping ,doing there on thing .
My heart settles the pain takes time to go away since its a tense muscle. I get more calm and relaxed and then everythings back to normal....why??? i wonder...

I cant eat alot of food cause of allergies ,never knew growing up which added to my insecurities ,self doubt ,unconfidence and some time i feel panic but now since i adjust my self and learn to cope with it I know how to handle it better since i'm an adult taking yoga, celestial music ,modern day/pop music,to calm down and reconnect and try to rebuild continuing relationship with my family. I can overcome anxiety but it took me this far to walk on the bus and in the mall with out blacking out with migranes bc of my allergies and coffee which aggregravated my anxiety.I had extreme food allergies...daily i was eating food i was allergic too not even knowing it which i believe was apart of my growing anxiety while young ,growing up. Now I m more aware of what not to eat the anxiety grew dooown a whoooooooole lot i mean major . I just have small anxieties here and there easy to manage, i still hang out , drink with friends usually juice bc i dont like alcohol. But sad part is...

I usually have a tendency to keep people at a destance to see if our personalities click and if were compatible to have friendship,association or neither ( just a passer by/or try to have a civil job matter and nothing else)

I really dont like to keep people close to me bc I truly dont like opening up unless im anonymous and even then i really dont like opening up. Sorry to say ESP if its nover the internet bc I dont know who you are...but talking safe doesnt hurt.

I act like everyone else now but I have been overcoming a great deal of allergies and anxiety which some of them were triggered by or alot by . Especially from the foods we eat. Also having a friend/boyfriend helped me to cope and learn how to open better more, how to better handle situations and most of the time im going with the flow and working them out gradually.

I do have my days of anxiety like for some reason listening to music on the bus or watching a movie on the floor sitting with family and friends makes me unease ,tense and nervous i dont know why. Especially sitting in the catholic church i get extremely nervous...these are my triggers really now .....having flat feet and walking around people in the begginning with flat shoes was the worst choice ever for anxiety in the past.

All in all i believe my food allergies ,my parents parting from each other and critical judgements while growing up ...is a soup of trouble brewing together into one bowl causing a mass of chaos but remember if theres a beginning theres an end also so the soup unmixes itselfs ....filters itself out from all the bad stuff and then the self healing and drug free healing comes in ...I had a good food diet and coping skills so far now all i need to figure out ...why and what makes me trigger at catholic church so quiet you can hear people breathe or cough...and or listening to music on a busy bus or watching a movie with a bunch of strangers on family night, Or a speach conffernce at a school or job.


oh well Im determined to get well...I figure out my allergies was the most cause of my Anxiety in the past but not now since i cut them out only little few triggers which is these.


I

You seem to be on a learning curve right now, but coming here to post this message to us signifies that you're taking a brief respite/break (I think). It's like a time-stamp message, and i'm sure that you'll be a much different person in a few weeks/months. That's what happens when we are going through great change and learning periods in our lives. So, what is the next step for you to take? You seem to understnd your allergies now, and that should help reduce yuor tension/anxiety somewhat. It was only a year or so ago that I deduced I have an allergy to gelatin. Throughout my youth, I was constantly eating sweets and then not understanding why I got high blood pressure and reddish skin after eating them. Now, my body is so primed to be anti-gelatine that if I rub a jelly-sweet on my arm I'll get a rash.

...but yes - where to next? You know, if you keep exposing yourself to these anxiety-inducing situations, then they will gradually become easier to manage. Keep the earphones with you just in-case you get a really bad attack, but always have to aim to be free of the ear phones too. It would be cool to constantly set new targets too.

Kevin