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Am I in need of mental help or therapy?

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Am I in need of mental help or therapy?

Postby davidanswers » Fri Jul 05, 2019 6:36 pm

I am facing a hard situation which dates back to early childhood. In summary there were marriage problems between my parents and due to cultural aspect, divorce was out of question. My mother used the approach of building or planting hate between the children and my father. After my father passed away, my interaction with my mother became closer and I discovered the truth that my father did what was best for the children and in summary he sacrificed his life for his children. I am a mature adult with international qualifications and never ever had a problem with the law (other than traffic fines), I never had trouble at school or within the area I was living in. I managed to find a way to try to amend the wrongs of the past, all I can say it is an unorthodox way or method. At the start of this issue after the passing of my father i gained so much weight as I did not know what to do and I have not given the rightful respect to my father, this is eating me inside, but once I figured a way to amend the wrongs, I started to feel better about myself. I planned the whole thing and I am in the process of completing the project, I will put it into action when I am ready. Now I am doing exercise for more than hour a day (sometimes I take one day a week for relaxation), I have lost considerable weight and I manage to eat well, I feel better inside as my project is going better than I expected. I can think straight and feel very good and proud of myself. Here is a link to my issue that I posted here before if anyone wants more info: family-support/topic208280.html. I acknowledge and understand that whatever I do now will not turn back time and make all wrongs right! and I understand that taking revenge is not the answer, what I am doing is defending my rights. I appreciate feedback to my question: Am I in major need of mental help? everyone needs some support, but am I going of the rocks as they say? thanks in advance.
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Re: Am I in need of mental help or therapy?

Postby Wally58 » Sat Jul 06, 2019 11:27 am

A very good question and you are not alone.
I think that many of us have asked that same question when we were aware that there was a problem, so you may have already answered your own question. :idea:
From my own personal struggles, I decided to go for an evaluation because things were nuts. At the time, I was self-medicating with alcohol. It seemed to be the only thing in my life that was working for me, but they wanted me to stop drinking.
I was hoping that they would have found something else other than my favorite method for relaxation and coping with issues. :shock:
It turned out that alcohol was 90% of my problem and preventing me from dealing with the other 10% with a clear and sober mind.
My past and how I was dealing with it was keeping me sick. I was not dealing with it, except to drink over it.
I'm not suggesting that this is your problem, as we are all different, except that we all want the stress and pain to go away. Or at least become manageable and livable.
For your own peace of mind and to answer your question, I would recommend setting an appointment with a doctor or therapist for an interview or evaluation.
Rule out physical stressors like chemical deficiencies or endocrine imbalances in the body first with a complete physical (if you haven't had one already). Your doctor may then refer you on to a specialist to find out more.
I was not able to fix myself. It took the help of professionals and peers who cared about me and loved me. I learned to love them back as we helped each-other get well.
Having to stay in an intolerable situation and trapped by the family/cultural expectations imposed upon one would be a torture. Life is too short to live like that.
Best of luck to you. :D
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Re: Am I in need of mental help or therapy?

Postby davidanswers » Sat Jul 06, 2019 2:38 pm

Thanks for your reply, I guess in this time and age everyone is struggling and needs some help. I am sorry to hear about your case and hopefully you are better now.
The issue here cannot be dealt with anyone else other than the parties involved: my mother, myself and all who have wronged me. In my opinion, sitting with someone and talking about it and maybe ending up with some meds, will not help me at all, because who wronged me will stay doing what they do: hurting me, and talking to them will not help, it is better talking to a brick wall, at least the wall will not do the opposite of what you ask! This relates to the situation, as explained in my post, I did find an unorthodox method in dealing with it, I am happy with it, I am feel well mentally and physically, I do good exercise in the morning and sometimes at the evening as well, it can reach more than 4 hours a day, my spirits is up! The members who wronged me, do not understand what is coming and don't know what I am doing or what I am preparing, they said that I am in too deep and need professional help, this was not said to me but to themselves, I managed to overhear them. I have others who know exactly what I am doing and they said I am on the right track. But I always like to get more feedback, so basically, if someone has the ability and encouragement to do exercise about 4 hours daily and their spirits is up!, would that person in urgent need of mental help?
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Re: Am I in need of mental help or therapy?

Postby Wally58 » Sat Jul 06, 2019 3:46 pm

You can't undo what has already happened and you probably won't change other people. Counseling may help you come to terms with what happened and how you process it. You can only change how you interpret events and react to others.
Exercise and keeping upbeat certainly helps. It never hurts to ask someone else what they think. A burden shared is a burden halved.
Use them as a mirror. They are on the outside looking in. You may hear a perspective that you hadn't considered before that would help you in how you relate to your family.
There will always be wrongs and regrets. We may fall into patterns and needs that are self-defeating to us. It is about finding the tools that will help us change our own thinking.
If you feel stable at this time, that is very good. If you feel that you are going off the rocks, there is help for that as well.
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