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Want to change therapist

Postby bellic007 » Fri Jan 22, 2021 9:15 am

I was seeing a therapist for 2 months and have only felt I am getting more worse.I also took therapy from this particular person before and during that time I had faced major pyscological struggles and aka lead me to skip my college.now after some months this person again contacted me and invited me.i again took therapy and then I started to feel worse than before.Like there was no sense of understanding between we two.when I sent serious trauma worksheets to him.what I receive was some programmed responses from him.Like a meme.he was smiling so weird in between our sessions like when I am so serious about something.that sort of humiliated me.Like even a normal person can talk to me with more empathy than him.What to do?
I am scared to lose therapy became so think I want it.but I want to find and built up a healthy connection with New therapist.I m confused
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Re: Want to change therapist

Postby lilyfairy » Sat Jan 23, 2021 3:30 am

If you don't feel it's helping you- or it's making things worse, I'd strongly recommend seeking out someone new. I've recently switched therapists. The guy I had been seeing I'd been with for 9+ years, but in the last few months I found things really not helpful- he was cancelling a lot of my appointments- and those of other people too according to my Dr. He also would not touch anything with my flashbacks because they are only partial flashbacks and we don't know what they're exactly about- need to wait for more to surface.

The new guy (it's probably nearly 12 months now) I've gone to is approaching everything from a trauma angle (his specialisation) and has already done EMDR sessions with me around the partial flashbacks, and I felt like I could function again. He's asked things no-one else has before. A fresh pair of eyes (and ears), and a totally different approach has done wonders. I had a child part present during my first session with the him- that's never happened before.

I've forced myself to sit through a lot of therapy with people who were either inexperienced, incompetent, or unsuitable for me to be working with. People I didn't trust and didn't feel like I was ever going to be able to, or where it was just no longer helpful. It's taken me a long time to understand that I should have pulled out of therapy with those people sooner, but sometimes recognising that it's no longer helpful can be hard to judge. It was my Dr who really brought it home to me with the last one that I needed to change.

Changing therapists is hard and scary, but there's no point sticking with something that's not working. I would recommend writing out your history to hand to a new therapist- I found it got really hard to dredge everything back up each time- I'd give them the typed out version and say "I'm happy to answer questions on any of that, but I don't want to have to relive every part of that document" and most have been cool with that.

Ask for recommendations- friends you know who may be in therapy, your regular doctor can sometimes offer suggestions of who may or may not be a good fit for you in your town.

Hugs if you'd like some.
First rule of mental health: Learn to distinguish who deserves an explanation, who deserves only one answer, and who deserves absolutely nothing.

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Re: Want to change therapist

Postby bellic007 » Sat Jan 23, 2021 8:57 am

lilyfairy wrote:If you don't feel it's helping you- or it's making things worse, I'd strongly recommend seeking out someone new. I've recently switched therapists. The guy I had been seeing I'd been with for 9+ years, but in the last few months I found things really not helpful- he was cancelling a lot of my appointments- and those of other people too according to my Dr. He also would not touch anything with my flashbacks because they are only partial flashbacks and we don't know what they're exactly about- need to wait for more to surface.

The new guy (it's probably nearly 12 months now) I've gone to is approaching everything from a trauma angle (his specialisation) and has already done EMDR sessions with me around the partial flashbacks, and I felt like I could function again. He's asked things no-one else has before. A fresh pair of eyes (and ears), and a totally different approach has done wonders. I had a child part present during my first session with the him- that's never happened before.

I've forced myself to sit through a lot of therapy with people who were either inexperienced, incompetent, or unsuitable for me to be working with. People I didn't trust and didn't feel like I was ever going to be able to, or where it was just no longer helpful. It's taken me a long time to understand that I should have pulled out of therapy with those people sooner, but sometimes recognising that it's no longer helpful can be hard to judge. It was my Dr who really brought it home to me with the last one that I needed to change.

Changing therapists is hard and scary, but there's no point sticking with something that's not working. I would recommend writing out your history to hand to a new therapist- I found it got really hard to dredge everything back up each time- I'd give them the typed out version and say "I'm happy to answer questions on any of that, but I don't want to have to relive every part of that document" and most have been cool with that.

Ask for recommendations- friends you know who may be in therapy, your regular doctor can sometimes offer suggestions of who may or may not be a good fit for you in your town.

Hugs if you'd like some.



Writing out history part is a good idea.I never thought of that .Like all i do was again tell the story over and over and each time I lose the emotional connection and the therapist thinks what actually he is trying to convey.Thank god I got someone who was specialised in dissociative disorders and also got a PhD.His pricing is little bit high but I think it's worth it.there would be an initial assesment which will look at our problems.
I am looking forward to that.
Dx Body Dysmorphic Disorder
Self diagnosed Dissociative Disorder
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bellic007
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 471
Joined: Sat Apr 11, 2015 4:51 pm
Local time: Mon Mar 01, 2021 6:28 am
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Re: Want to change therapist

Postby lilyfairy » Sun Jan 24, 2021 1:10 am

I got to a point where re-telling the "story" each time, I was either overwhelmed by having to go over it again, or I was detached from it completely and could talk about events without any feeling- even somewhat laugh them off. I'd flip flop between the two. I'd also have a short version and a long version- depending on if I got a feeling I could trust them/click with them or not. I'm slowly getting better at trusting gut feeling.

Really hope the new therapist works out well for you.
First rule of mental health: Learn to distinguish who deserves an explanation, who deserves only one answer, and who deserves absolutely nothing.

Forum Rules

Whatever you're doing today, do it with the confidence of a four-year-old in a Batman t-shirt.
lilyfairy
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Posts: 12180
Joined: Sun May 08, 2011 10:34 am
Local time: Mon Mar 01, 2021 11:58 am
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