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Improving responses to self-harm for people with BPD.

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Improving responses to self-harm for people with BPD.

Postby Jana2015 » Sun Jul 05, 2015 11:13 am

Hello - thank you for showing an interest in this study and looking at my post!

Sometimes people with Borderline Personality Disorder experience unhelpful responses to their self-harm. I am really interested in trying to identify which responses people have found helpful and why.

On this basis we can try to make recommendations, based on your experience, to improve the choices and responses available to people who self-harm.

I am really keen to hear from people who have a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder or Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder, who have self-harmed in the past, to find out what responses you have found helpful.


Responses could mean any reaction by or interaction with clinical staff, other professionals involved, family, friends or anyone else who became relevant to your experience following self-harming.

I am doing this study as part of my MSc in mental health nursing at King's College London and have received ethical approval for the study. If you would like some more information about the project and a copy of the participant information sheet, please contact me at jana.schittenhelm@kcl.ac.uk

Many thanks and all the best,

Jana



Responsible Person: Jana Schittenhelm MSc Student King's College London
(Project Supervisor: Ian Noonan)
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Re: Improving responses to self-harm for people with BPD.

Postby oath » Wed Aug 19, 2015 4:25 am

Diagnosed with BPD and know someone with BPD very well and seen how people react to her self harm.

What is most helpful is when someone addresses the feeling rather than the action. When people address only the self harm I just feel effed up. It would be helpful if someone tried to understand WHY. If they could see how bad I was hurting in the moment, if they understood that this self harm wasn't me, but rather a response to pain that I do not know how to tolerate. I find that I get angry when people criticize self harm or a self harming behaviour...it's like they're taking away my only outlet for my pain. It feels unfair. Like, I turn all my pain inside, I don't hurt anyone else, but they want to take away the one thing I have that makes me feel better. Even turning it on myself isn't good enough for them, it shames me, makes me feel like they hate me just for having feelings.

I remember one time I was with my friend when she was getting stitches and she began to cry when the freezing needle went in. The doctor just said "well you should be used to it by now." I thought that was ignorant, of course it is gonna hurt more than self harming, because by the time she was getting the needle she was calm and more present in her body. When she self harms she barely feels it (according to her) and whatever pain she does feel calms her in the moment. But people think it's about liking pain, and it kind of is in a way...but also, it's a way of stopping the pain inside your head by feeling it elsewhere in a way that makes more sense. At least that's how I feel about it.
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Re: Improving responses to self-harm for people with BPD.

Postby vzp » Mon Jul 31, 2017 4:55 am

Hi, Jana, good luck with the study.

My first diagnosis was Borderline PD. I was a withdrawn person, and suffered at the time of very deep depression. I was lonely, my sexuality was a great problem, and lived in a social environment devoid of emotional support or togetherness or harmony.

I tried to commit suicide.

My first good experiences for a great many years immediately after the suicide attempt was hospitalizaiton. I had been suffering from extreme social isolation, and the staff and other patients alleviated that. The doctor was not helpful...he treated me as if he were a police investigator. I refused to talk to him ever afterward. He examined and treated me via his resident intern.

Generally, my solitude and loneliness stayed with me my entire life (I'm old in my sixties) and my hunger for companionship and for plain socialization is high. I spend most of my days on internet forums, and establishing real relationships (with friends or lovers) is very hard. In fact, I had only one friend in my life, but I betrayed him very many times, and he got tired of it. He had OCD.

I had many so-called lovers, but there was no more than sex in any of these relationships. Many is relative, I kept records, there were 50, not counting prostitutes. The fifty were lay women, in the sense that clergy calls non-clergy people lay people, and I called non-professional women lay women.

So what helped me, and still helps me, is plainly companionship: meeting new people, impressing them, and if they are women, then seducing them. The other two things that give me joy, great joy, is when I used to listen to music; that actually gave me the only solace for eight years after my breakdown. The other one is creative writing and creating inventions. When I write something good, I feel this fuzzy warm feeling in my gut. When I create a new invention, I giggle. I like humour, and I love to laugh, but since my only friend left me in disgust, I get hardly any laugh out of life.
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