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What do to do about my pot addiction?

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What do to do about my pot addiction?

Postby WTFDIDIDO » Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:39 pm

Ok, so I have DID which makes things very complicated but regardless at this point I think pretty much every part of me loves pot in some way shape or form and I can no longer even go more than 2 days straight without it.

Anyway, it's a huge problem. I lost a really good friend, other friends are on my case, I have to hide it from my family, and plenty of other reasons such as, this girl I met yesterday said "I just met you and you sound like dumbass" ***

*** this was because I went to a day pool bar and tried to sneak in pot mixing it into cigars (but of course they opened my whole pack and saw the bottom wrapping was missing then they expected them and saw there was pot). This in turn also dampered my day because I was really looking to smoking. I am a pipe smoker 90% of the time but knew that wouldn't work and was really surprised they caught me.

You see, I am at a point where pot is arguably the most important thing in my life and it scares me. I tried to quit several times I always end up just going through some really really and I mean really bad withdrawal symptoms (such as completely losing consciousness randomly- and this will not happen if I smoke pot at least 1-2 times a week; of course, now a days I smoked 5 times a week min). Once I relapse I always question why I even bothered trying to quit when I know I am incapable.

I go to bed sometimes knowing as soon as I finish work the next day I can smoke and it makes me happy.

Problem is also when I am high a lot of times I do not recall what happened nor do I make the smartest decisions (especially financially wise). I also trip out hard and my mind races all over the place (although this happens naturally).

I can go on, but point is I just don't what to do, I feel like a lost cause.

Thanks for reading and any suggestions will help but end of day I feel like there is really nothing I can do at this point.
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Re: What do to do about my pot addiction?

Postby Wally58 » Sun Jun 10, 2018 6:39 pm

As my own consequences built up from using, I became more and more convinced that I had to stop using.
I never went to prison. That was a 'not-yet'.
I was never declared clinically psychotic. That was also a 'not yet'.
I was headed that way if I continued the course I was on.
Stopping is never easy. If it was, there would be no addicts or alcoholics. If sheer will-power worked, there would be no addicts or alcoholics either.
People couldn't tell me what to do. It all sounded like nagging and criticism to me. My family still loved me, but they could no longer be around me.
I pulled some bone-headed stunts myself. :twisted:
The epiphany has to come from within. You have to want this more than anything else in the world. Sometimes you have to be taken off the street and taken to a safe (inpatient) place like detox or rehab.
I was dual-diagnosis too. They can't treat the DID effectively until you are clean. They can't offer mental health therapy to you while you are under the influence of cannabis. They can't prescribe the meds you may need while you are under the influence of cannabis.
At one time, I could not imagine life without pot. I had to change. Recovery is tough and not everyone can do it. The statistics are dismal. Be one of those that makes it.
It needs to be 'first things first'.
Best of luck to you. :D
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