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Was I being stalked, or am I just crazy?

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Was I being stalked, or am I just crazy?

Postby jag140 » Tue Apr 18, 2017 3:17 am

Let me begin by stating that i am a male college student that has been having problems with paranoia and anxiety as of late... this, of course, doesn't exactly help my case. Two semesters ago, I started seeing this strange woman popping up in random locations just outside my classroom after it ended or before it began. I thought nothing of it but, come next semester, she repeated the process and would appear several times a day after class, after my TA job, or just behind buildings when I'm taking walks (I take really long walks late at night because the solitude helps me zone out).

As a result of this, after every encounter I would change my route but she would still catch on. I still was a bit skeptical about the whole thing at first until she popped up a few feet behind me off-campus in the middle of winter at 11:30 at night talking loudly to herself on the cellphone; as if the following in the car wasn't enough... Then I 'knew' I was being stalked. I told several of my friends and most of them were skeptical and now take this as some sort of huge joke. This entire incidence I feel has damaged me and it just enrages me so much that even today, they just laugh whenever it is brought up. Even my family has been largely unsympathetic towards this situation, essentially telling me to just 'deal with it.'

I've been talking to a counselor, and to a lesser extent, a psychiatrist about it, and it seems that they are skeptical to say the least on this issue as well. Both have implied that i might have a delusional or psychotic illness of some sort and put me on antipsychotics to relieve the paranoia a bit and, although the stalking continued, I just sorta grew indifferent. Cognitively, I have been fine since then... there's no depression... I only feel paranoia late at night, but it makes me tired all the time and I feel my academic career has been put at risk because of it.

That was, until I went to the pharmacy to pick up the medication and I ran into her again. It drove me haywire, as though I felt the counseling room was bugged or something. Even in counseling now, I feel discomfort in a location I once felt I didn't, and whenever the counselor or psychiatrist suggests that, unless i gather evidence, I could just be seeing things, I get reduced nearly to tears.

Then it all stopped but frankly the paranoia is still there, and I'm honestly terrified because unless I can gather evidence that I was being stalked, which is impossible now, I might get diagnosed with a psychotic illness. I can't talk to anyone except the counselor I see on a bi-weekly basis because people will think I'm crazy. The stalking is, of course, no longer a problem but I'm still laughed at for complaining about it and I still constantly have to look over my shoulders and observe my environment.

Now I am truly starting to doubt what I see (a problem I can't talk about with others, otherwise they'll either give the "I told you so" expression" or will look at me as less than a human) yet i'm still angry at myself for not collecting evidence. What should I do if I can't express this problem to anyone?

tl:dr - Got stalked on a college campus or maybe it's a delusion. Nobody believes me and i'm left a paranoid mess. To make matters worse, the psychiatrist, counselor, and most people I've talked to about this think i may have a psychotic illness, unless I collect evidence. What should I do?
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Re: Was I being stalked, or am I just crazy?

Postby eterea107 » Tue Apr 18, 2017 11:29 am

Were you prescribed an antipsychotic med? If so, have you been taking it as prescribed and daily?

I empathize with your situation. I'd venture a guess you're not being stalked...but it can feel VERY real to you, as you know.

Or, it is possible you are being followed.

Antipsychotic meds tend to stabilize a person fairly quickly....which one are you on? Geodon works for me.

Your psychiatrist needs to fully evaluate you. You don't need to provide "evidence." If you weren't fully evaluated, get a new psychiatrist ASAP. Some mood disorders have psychotic features. You need more medical evaluation if they are speculating "psychotic illness."

FYI, many people with a mental illness find the term "crazy" offensive." I think the vast majority of the members here prefer the term "mentally ill." It can feel demeaning to be called crazy, a nutcase, etc. Please don't feed the stigma and welcome to the forums.
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Re: Was I being stalked, or am I just crazy?

Postby bipolar123 » Thu Jun 15, 2017 11:17 am

I don't think you are crazy and your Psychiatrist should entertain the possibility that you are correct.

"Just because you are paranoid, don't mean they're not after you."
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