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How do I(17F) deal with my stalker (23M) of 2 years?

Open Discussions About Stalking and Harassment.

How do I(17F) deal with my stalker (23M) of 2 years?

Postby throwaway47240900 » Wed Oct 28, 2015 3:04 am

Before I start, I had no intention of leading him on at all. I did not understand any of this until it escalated to a level of no return. But let’s be realistic here. Do you really think as a man in your 20’s that you could have an actual relationship with a 15 year old girl? NO! But this guy, this guy just does not get it at all.

This whole mess started back when I was 15. I was a few months into my first job and we had a new hire. Let's call him B. B was a nice guy to everyone, always smiles and always trying to lighten the mood. He was also homeless - by choice. He had money, but he spent his money on everyone at the job ALL the time. From what I can tell this was his way of making friends, buying friendships. He also mentioned to very select people (me included) that he will become a wealthy heir in the future. Whether this is true or not I’m unsure of because he does have connections. I mention this because at time I feel like he was trying to bribe me with this knowledge.

Anyways, B and I were coworkers and naturally we started chatting, getting to know each other, etc. He was always nice to me and at times bought me some small gifts. (I never accepted any) At this point I couldn't differentiate his behavior towards me from anyone else at work because while he talked to me and gave me gifts, he did this to a few other people as well. Oh, how naive I was.

I’ll list some key events here:

1. After a few months of him working at the job we exchanged phone numbers for convenience. We texted about random stuff, a lot of the times it was me asking him what my schedule was because he practically lived in the jobs crew room. Once he started texting too much, ex: "Good morning! How was your sleep?" or "Hey, how was school, did you do good on that test?" was when I was starting to reply less and less. A bit creepy. When he asked why I stopped replying to his texts I just said I’m not in the mood to talk. That was the end of texting with him.

2. B would stalk my social media sites to get all my info. The very first instant I can remember was when he surprised me with a brand new White LG G2 phone. At this point in time I was looking to get a new phone and on facebook I had posted a question on my phone carrier’s page asking about what colors they offer. Since this page is made public he was able to find this out just by googling my name. I ended up declining this nice gesture as I already bought the black version of the LG G2. He insisted that I keep it and have a “spare phone.” Still declined it. I also didn’t understand how he found out until a few months later.

3. Printed my facebook profile picture and my name on a t shirt to give to me for my birthday. (Found out my birthday from looking at the manager’s files because he was able to spend a lot of time in there.) Also, I never added him on facebook AND my name at the time was in Japanese so he had to do some snooping to actually find me. This gift I accepted because he was begging me profusely. He legitimately looked like he was gonna cry.

4. Remember when I said he always bought the entire crew gifts? Well, I quickly found out that was all a scheme just to get me to accept his gifts because otherwise I’d just decline them. These were simple gifts, like a pack of gum(brand that I told him I like), reese candy bars,(my favorite chocolate bar),lip balm that I used(bought some more of the same brand.) There was also multiple types of gift cards and coupons. Keep in mind there’s about 40 of us so he bought 40 x everything there, multiple times!

5. After work 9-10PM there would be maybe 4 times where he would follow me to the mall/bus terminal because he wanted to “chat.” He would run up behind me in the dark and strike up a conversation like it was not a big deal at all. Once, I told him I was gonna start running because I was gonna miss my bus (truth) but ended up missing it anyways. A few minutes later I watch him walk in front of me to go to the other side of the terminal. He was just walking all around, sorta like he was looking for someone. After 2 minutes he decided to walk back to the mall and I could see his smirk as he walked passed me... After that I had a talk with him. I told him I felt really uncomfortable with him following me, sometimes from a distance, and that I would appreciate if he would stop. I also told him that I do not want any more gifts from him at all. He said he would stop everything. He didn’t.

This is the time where I told management a quick summary on what’s happening between me and B. It took me a long time to reach for some actual help because I thought I could handle this by myself. WRONG. Management took it very seriously and warned B if he continued this behavior with a minor they would be calling the cops. He didn’t take this seriously either, thought it was just a bluff because prior to this he and the management were all buddy-buddy because of all the gifts a such.

6. The recording of him saying he’d rather “make love to me forever” than “rape me once.”
His exact words. Another coworker of mine (20sM) had asked B why he always seems to be around the job when I’m working. Somehow they get on to this question and that was his actual response. ###$. After this I’m avoiding him as much as possible. He worked late night shift so I rarely ever saw him unless he was still hanging out in the crew room (which BTW management was getting tired of him sleeping there.)

Queue B’s termination:
After ignoring the multiple warnings to stop hanging out in the crew room when he’s not working, B get’s fired. Finally! I won’t have to deal with him anymore. Wrong again.

I’m still 16 at this point, February of this year. It’s Valentine’s Day. I haven’t heard a peep from B for months! Well that came to an end when the office calls me down and gives me a bouquet of flowers from “my secret admirer.” I knew it was B because it came with a note something to the effect of this. http://imgur.com/BgodUhi
Now that isn’t the end of it. When I get home there's about 8-10 different types of bouquet flowers on the kitchen table with my name on the tag. I’m guessing these flowers cost at least $250. It was ridiculous. I had a fun time explaining all that to my parents.

Another few months go by:
B sends me a personalized happy birthday song which is sung by a Japanese woman on the piano through email. (Got it somehow..) He posted the video on a website with my first and last name on it. B pretty much bought domains in my first and last name. Seriously?!

Soon after:
B finds my eBay account. How? I do not have a clue. I have kept this a secret from everyone. It just so happens he purchased one of these items to confirm his suspicion and there you have it. Now he stalks my eBay account. The first item he bought, I messaged him and told him this would be the first and last item he could purchase from me and that I would be blocking him. Of course, he makes another account, in the name of a famous actor from a TV show I watch. How does he know I watch this TV show? I don’t have a ######6 clue. I go ahead and block this account too. No contact from B for another few months.

Present day: I get a package with only my first name taped to the front. No return address. I’m guessing he came to my house and dropped it off personally. Again, I never gave him this information. It contains more reese chocolate, a gum pack, and I’m guessing maybe 500 eBay business cards with my store name on it.

I don’t want anything from him! I just want him to leave me alone. I’m worried about what’s going to happen when I turn 18. If he’s still pursuing me after months of no actual face to face contact then what stops him from trying to make a “relationship” work when I’m “legal.” I’m thinking about getting a restraining order. Should I be keeping track of the evidence of his harassment from now on? Advice is very much appreciated.

TL;DR: former coworker still stalks me online, sends expensive gifts to my house with no return address after I have repeatedly told him to stop.
throwaway47240900
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