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Really need help - dangerous phobia of doctors

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Really need help - dangerous phobia of doctors

Postby gotrocks » Mon Apr 20, 2009 7:10 am

Ok, I really need help and I dont know what else to do. I know a good bit about the human psyche and how to get through these kinds of problems. I have helped a large number of people through conditions such as anorexia nervosa, chemical dependancy/addiction, self esteem issues/depression, etc. The list goes on. But now I am stumped. My girlfriend is 35 weeks pregnant and has an uncontrollable fear of doctors. Even thinking about them makes her want to vomit, she shakes, and begins to cry uncontrollably. Her heart races and she begins to hyperventillate. It is mostly related to pelvic exams, but does indeed expand to just about anything doctor related. Being pregnant and about to pop out a baby, you can see why this is a problem. She cannot identify why she feels this way or what causes this fear, no matter how much I poke and prod, I cannot get a definite answer. It has to do with a stranger invading her personal space, poking, prodding, testing, etc. I think it's mostly the touching. But once again she is not sure. But my suspicion is that she was molested by a nurse/resident/whatever when she was young. We cannot afford a psychologist at this point. I need help. What do I do? I've tried a number of different things, but I am open to trying anything and everything, even if I have done it before. Please just list all suggestions that you can come up with. I need a quick fix short term solution to this long term problem. After we get through the birth we can continue to deal with this later, but for now, we can't even get through an exam without tears streaming down her face. How do I help her? What do I do? Obviously in the future this couuld be a serious problem, as she will not even get a PAP smear, and with pelvic cancers being present in such a high percentage of women, I am extremely concerned. Start your engines folks, I'm going to need all the horsepower in all your brains to get this one nailed.

Thanks to everyone in advance, no matter how small the contribution.
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Postby Chucky » Mon Apr 20, 2009 10:27 pm

Hi,

Is it perhaps just male doctors that she fears? If so, then she is entitled to ask for a female one. Ultimately, she or you should let this be known to whichever doctor is treating her. If the doctor recognises that there is a fear, then he/she will be better able to treat. Plus, having the fear 'out in the open' might actually reduce it in her mind.

Kevin
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Postby easyeft » Wed Apr 22, 2009 10:49 pm

Hello,

Maybe she knows why but cant share it with you at this point.

Or she may not know consciously, have her say these phrases to herself in order to find the origin of the problem. Change <emotion> for whatever she feels describes this problem in a way that speaks to her.

1.I feel <emotion>. .. and...
2.I feel <emotion> because I choose to...and...
3.I choose to because I believe it serves me to.

Following these thoughts to their logical conclusion will bring the answer to the surface.
It may not be something as obvious as abuse but it would explain it.

As far as what to do about this issue, you need to try EFT to resolve the issue. It is by far the fastest way to overcome any kind of phobia or anxiety.

Search for EFT, download the manual and tap the problem away!!!
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Re: Really need help - dangerous phobia of doctors

Postby beep » Wed Sep 15, 2010 9:04 am

I also have a fear of ob doctors... It scares me that I am 35 and have never had a pap but I just cannot bring myself to do it. I have an 18 yr old daughter and had a bad experience when delivering her but mostly due to my phobia..The doctors did not like my fears at all and basically took over my decisions while giving birth because im sure they thought I wasnt able to make correct decisions myself. I delivered a healthy baby girl 18 years ago and have lived with the horrible memory of the experience ever since. For your friend, I say if she is as terrified of the whole experience as i was, let her make the decisions and find a good doctor that will understand her needs. Just because we fear and have horrible anxiety does not mean we care any less about our children. If i even think about going to the Dr for "that" (pap) i have a huge pounding in my chest and feel like im going to vomit and i get extremely violent feeling like i must protect myself to no end.. I cant do it, its just too humiliating and scary. I am sorry to everyone that doesnt understand, I know mentally how important it is. But to ask me to do that in my mind is basically asking me to accept being raped. I hope this helps you help your friend
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