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How can I get more heterosexual?

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How can I get more heterosexual?

Postby Origins » Tue Apr 09, 2019 9:40 pm


I'm an 19 year old guy, who needs some help. I don't really know what my sexuality is (i'm not looking for a label or something, I really don't care). But the problem is that, emotionally I fall in love with girls but physically i'm attracted to men, so I don't really get an erection for girls. Or at least not what it normally has to be. I've come to terms with myself and i'm okay with being not heterosexual, but everytime when I watch gay porn, which gets me really horny, afterwards I feel disgusted of myself and sad. It just doesn't feel right, like it isn't me. Somewhat like i'm someone else the moment i'm invested in something homosexual. I don't know why because I grew up in an environment where they aren't judgemental of being gay. I really feel depressed, I don't have a goal to work to. My dream as a kid was to start a family with my future wife and have (biological) children, but it feels like that dream is shattered. i'm scared it just won't work because of me not getting an erection (i've never done anything sexual with anyone before). It also holds me back from having a relationhip, because I don't want to ruin my girlfriend her life when I am in a relationship. So I have a couple of questions about it: is there a way to get more interested in the other sex (like conditioning yourself into it), or a way to eliminate the attraction towards, or a way to get my libido up (I don't really know it's my libido that's the problem).

Anyways thanks in advanced!
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Re: How can I get more heterosexual?

Postby RottenFish » Thu Apr 11, 2019 5:38 pm

I'm so sorry to hear you're struggling with your sexuality.

Sexuality is not something we can just "wish away" or condition. If it were that easy, then we can just switch our sexuality with a snap of a finger.

I know gay men who joined gay conversion camps with disastrous results. They thought they could change their sexuality. After leaving the camp, they ended up hating themselves more because they realized they couldn't change their sexuality.

I would never suggest someone to force-change their sexuality. Having expectations of marriage and kids is very nice, but for some of us it is just a dream that will never come true. Love and accept yourself for who you are.
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Re: How can I get more heterosexual?

Postby Malasha » Fri Apr 12, 2019 10:24 am

I think in this case, the emotional component is more important. Especially since it manifests itself in the fact that you like girls and in disgust for yourself after watching gay porn. We choose our friends and partners based on our emotional preferences. *mod edit- unhelpful*
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