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I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

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I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby portox1311 » Tue Sep 25, 2018 8:27 pm

I am a 17 year old boy who at the moment identifies as straight. I am emotionally, romantically, and sexually attracted to girls. I have a girlfriend and would not trade her for the world, and have 0% interest in men.

What leads me to create this post is that I have always identified as straight (undoubetly), but looking back I'm not sure what my sexuality was. It started with a sexual attraction to drag queens (if i saw one in real life although, I would not feel attraction whatsoever). From ages 14-16, I would masterbate to drag queens (but rarely to men without makeup, and certainly not masculine men).

Over those years, I would also masterbate to women, and would always fantasize about them at school etc. I also was certainly romantically, emotionally, as well as sexuality attracted to them. With men(in the form of drag queens) I would only think about them sexually, and was in no way attracted to any man in person. Everytime a sad song would come on, I would think about a woman, and it was in no way forced and never thought of myself as anything other than straight.



I have come to this question board to ask what I was, because I don't think I was bi (as I had 0 interest emotionally or romantically in men) and only liked men pretending to be women sexually. I liked women sexually romantically, and emotionally.



I have come to the logic that if my sexuality was a spectrum from 1-100 (100 being straight), I would be near an 80%.



I was wondering what your thoughts are and any advice is appreciated.
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby portox1311 » Wed Sep 26, 2018 3:56 pm

*Something extra:

I have a fetish for very girly, affeminate girls. I say this because this is where I think my attraction to drag queens came into play because all of them impersonate girly girls. I have always masterbated to the drag queen, but when I reach climax, I wanted them to be female.
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby Snaga » Wed Sep 26, 2018 6:25 pm

Wow what an interesting post! I wonder how many men who identify as straight feel the same?

portox1311 wrote:I have come to the logic that if my sexuality was a spectrum from 1-100 (100 being straight), I would be near an 80%.


In my book, that'd be somewhat Bi. But the rest of your post doesn't really seem to back that up, unless you have at least some fascination for same-sex.

I think you may be onto something about the imagery of drag queens being an attraction. And not what's underneath. I'm... about 50/50 bisexual male, and while the idea of sex with a guy in a dress isn't particularly appealing (not necessarily a turn off, but definitely not a turn on), I quite like the visual imagery of drag, not the absolute over-the-top with the clown makeup or anything, but c'mon. classic RuP is fabulous. Peter as Eddie in Funeral Parade of Roses is gorgeous. It's like magic- you know it's a trick, but the illusion is compelling.

If you're really that interested in your sexual orientation, take something like the Flexuality Test- it's easily googleable under that term. A warning- the test is weighted towards less than 100% straight or gay. The idea being that most people aren't completely one thing, or the other.

But for all practical purposes, if the male form doesn't turn you on, you don't sound very Bi.

How do you feel about partially transitioned trans women, then? Take Bailey Jay, for instance (my favourite example). Cute girl with a penis. I don't really care what's between her legs, I think she's a hottie either way. Shemale porn isn't a particular fetish of mine, however it's my understanding a lot of supposedly 'straight' guys dig that genre, I think the main theory being that a 'chick with a dick' is a 'safe' way of exploring phallic fascination in a way that's not gay. I have a hard time wrapping my bisexual head around straight guys finding a penis, even one on a girl, a turn on, but that's cool, I can dig that argument. So what about them? Say you never knew who a girl like Bailey was, and was out on a date, and Surprise! you don't find a toot-toot down there, but a wing-wang.

Deal breaker?

If so, I'm going with you just like the illusion, more than any reality behind the illusion.
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby Snaga » Wed Sep 26, 2018 6:28 pm

I'll add that I also agree with the general gist of your argument, that sometimes a drag queen can be more girly than a girl. Again, the illusion is what seems to compel you?
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby portox1311 » Wed Sep 26, 2018 7:53 pm

You could not have said it better...I am attracted to the illusion of a girly girl, but nothing more than that

And the question you presented...I think that definitely would be a deal breaker. I guess it took a while to figure out my fetish, but I do want to thank you for your help as now it makes it more clear.

Anyways, would you have called me a straight male with an misinterpreted fettish, or something else. Not that it is important, just wondering.

And an update, I was curious and tried to see if I got "excited" by a shemale or a drag queen, and no luck. That makes me think that I just misinterpreted the fettish
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby Snaga » Wed Sep 26, 2018 8:13 pm

Well for me, I'm not even sure you could call yourself 80% straight if you really don't have any interest in either men as an emotional/romantic interest; or a physical object of lust; or aren't even interested in a penis attached to a hot girl. Sounds pretty darn straight, to me- with just the thing for drag queens as the image of a woman. Sounds pretty harmless, too. I think I'd be tempted to bump that 80% up closer to 100%. I mean, I'm very Bi, and drag queens as sex objects is something that's never occurred to me, like you I'm more into the idea of the illusion- so if it don't sexually excite you, and TG girls don't even float your boat in a real-world 'okay I'm about to play with a cock that's not mine' sense, then I don't see that you have a whole lot of questioning to do. I think we're both agreed you're pretty straight at this point?

Do you think being straight is boring? If you don't... I'm calling you straight. To me that would be dreadfully one-dimensional.
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby portox1311 » Fri Sep 28, 2018 6:22 am

Yeah that makes total sense. I think I was misguided by a fettish for girly girls, and im glad I now know that. It all makes sense because back then I realized that I like drag queens, so I must try gay porn. I watched it many times, but never really knew why, and it didn't seem really like me. The normal male body never turned me on, so I would end up watching tranny porn, or very affeminante guys. Thats probably because I read into the illusion, when i really didn't like anything behind it. Everything was based on my attraction to girly girls. This makes complete sense because I never thought of myself as anything other as straight, and talking to you makes me believe that I was right, because my whole attraction to drag queens and later tranny was based on a misinterpreted fettish.

It is interesting this summer, which is when I questioned what I had done because I realized I have no interest in males sexually, and especially not in real life.
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby portox1311 » Sat Sep 29, 2018 9:58 am

Does that above make sense? Also thanks so much for your help as this will be my last post here, as I seemed to have resolved the misunderstanding. I have one last request: could you summarize what you have gathered as to what my reasoning and my identity was back then in a couple sentences. That would really be helpful!
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby Snaga » Sat Sep 29, 2018 2:10 pm

Me summarize? I'm not in your head, sweetie, but it seems as if you just like the illusion and think it's attractive, with no desire for the male underneath, in regards to drag queens. And no real desire to be with a MtF that has the lower boy bits intact. And yes, it makes sense to me. I may be bisexual, but I'm not overly interested in drag queens as male sexual objects. A guy in a dress doesn't particularly turn me on (if anything, I'd rather be the one in the dress). But drag queens, as an illusion of femaleness, are very fascinating, though I've never fapped to any. So I think we're on the same page, there. As for transsexuals who still have boy bits, well, you don't like penises. I do, so we differ, there. But personally, I don't see why supposedly straight guys dig tranny porn unless it's just the taboo fantasy made slightly less 'gay' by virtue of the penis being attached to a girl...

Post again whenever you have a mind to- there are plenty other forums to explore! :)
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Re: I Am Straight Now, But Am Questioning what i was

Postby Autumn218 » Thu Oct 04, 2018 9:32 am

First of all i am very shy talking about sex so i can't express myself well but anyway.
Sexuallity is strange.
I am a girl and at some point i was very attracted to guys who looked like girls. I could analyze this more but anyway.
I hated anything that was too masculine. But now i kind of got over it and like masculine guys too. But not completetly over it.
I am pretty sure i am very straight.although going with girls doesn't disgust me much.i actually feel emotionally better with them probably why it confuses me.but not sexually.
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