Hello...
I just turned 41 and have had an addiction to porn for over 20 years. I have tried so many times to quite but never ever successful for even the most determined times. I was so bad at watching that even after masturbation I would watch more porn... probably damaging more neurological symptoms for myself? I also have a mental illness and have high anxiety and for about 10 years did not get into any real social engagements and rather stayed in watching hours on hours of porn. It makes me upset but now I'm getting over my social anxiety!
I would like to know how long it would take to rewire my brain and if it is truly possible,= because at times I get headaches that are debilitating until I get my dopamine release. At my age with little intimacy with women... I'm afraid of a relationship because I'm "damaged goods"?
I know that if I was to get a girlfriend I would have impulses to watch if I started sleeping with her as a trigger back to watching xxx videos. "If I was able to quite and also even get a gf"?
What I really want to know is what I'm in for as far as rewiring my brain and getting to where I never want or desire to watching again? What are symptoms and what to think when they occur, rather than give into temptation, which never seems to fail!?
I have heard that it could take up to even 5 years to rewire, is that true? Becuase I feel like I'm already old with hardly any experience with women socially and sexually... I don't want to have to wait 5 years to be "healed"?
Maybe someone could recommend a good book that can tell you what I'd be going through and how to deal with the symptom or urge?
Is it possible for me to overcome at my age with so many neurons connected deeply with many triggers to my addiction? What am I in for... I've heard a lot about depression, anxiety and sleeping issues... not to mention my diagnosis of schitzoaffective disorder that will probably make it even harder to recover, ...any comments on the disorder and quiting?