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It only seems to be getting worse?

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It only seems to be getting worse?

Postby dapper-dino » Sun Mar 06, 2016 8:21 pm

I've had SM since i could talk (so since i was 2), and every specialist I've seen has told me 'It improves with age', and that i'll 'grow out of it'.
I'm 16 now and its just getting worse. Its not just strangers, teachers, or professionals now, I cant talk to either of my grandmas properly (despite having been able to in the past), i struggle with my friends, the majority of my relationships are online, or mainly online, i rarely see anyone outside of my close family because the more i push myself the worse it seems to get.
There was a point in which my therapist encouraged going out and meeting new people, i was given support in the community so i wasn't with my mom all the time, but instead of broadening my horizons its narrowed them, my therapist no longer suggests group activities, I've been told to make sure i maintain my current friendships, and to make sure i see my best friend at least once a month and that's it.
I've tried reaching out to a local autism support group who run a SM group, but its only open to 4-10 year olds? I have no friends who deal with this, and i know no one else my age who still struggles so badly with it, i feel so alone.

It feels like my entire support team has given up on me ever being able to defeat this, every time we push my boundaries they just get worse, its been getting worse since i was 8, and no matter how many people I've seen, its never improved, and now even the people who are supposed to help have given up...

Does it always get worse before it gets better? are there other things i can try apart from 'getting out more'? I'm so lost here, it feels like it will never improve, I have no idea how im going to pursue my dream job, make new friends, or even be vaguely independent when i rely on the people around me to talk for me. Thank you for reading all the blabble, I'm compleatly at a loss here :cry:
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Re: It only seems to be getting worse?

Postby Cath-Cy » Fri Aug 12, 2016 4:59 am

Hi,

I know you posted your message a while ago so I don't know if you will see this.

I don't think selective mutism will necessarily go away without treatment. I wonder if you developed selective mutism when very young, and then social phobia later on (social phobia tends to develop at a later date in its full form).

On Facebook there is a group for older teens/adults with SM called SM space cafe.

There is a book called the selective mutism resource manual by Maggie Johnson. There is a new version due out in September (I think) which will have lots of information on overcoming selective mutism for teenagers. It's not a cheap book but there's not much else out there about treatment for teenagers - most is aimed at young children.

Perhaps trying a new activity where no one know you or has the expectation that you won't speak might help?

Good luck - you are still very young with lots of time to change but don't wait to grow out of it - seek help now.xx
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Re: It only seems to be getting worse?

Postby Killuminatimj » Fri Aug 19, 2016 10:38 pm

Try finding information on 'progressive mutism', its a form of SM that gets worse with age. You might also look at getting anti-depressents as these are supposed to help with the condition especially in adults :)
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