Hi,
I was diagnosed with schizophrenia 8 years ago, and externally i am coping; i got a degree , i have a job, i live with mate who doesn't know of my condition, i'm even going on a date tomorrow with a girl i like, and i try by best to live as normally as possible....but i've never been able to shake the thought that people can read my mind. Some sort of device may have been implanted in my brain when i was younger, and somehow everyone around me can read my thoughts.
Right now, whilst typing this, i am thinking of my neighbours laughing at me and pitying me for even posting this message.
I walk past people and they are laughing at my thoughts, i hear people commenting on things i have thought, have conversations with people with my thoughts, i hear people say that they can read my mind, I hear cars beeping at my thoughts (i.e beep this tune if you can hear my thoughts, and then they do) and there are too many coincidences that seem to imply that people are reading my mind.
The thought hasn't left me for 8 years, wherever i am i will always be aware of people in the vicinity hearing my thoughts, its been constant, and its been pretty horrible...i will wake up and worry about what people will have made of my dreams.....
Rationally, i tell myself it isn't possible, i google mind reading devices, i read about other schizophrenics who have incredibly similar experiences, i talk to friends and family...and this helps, but this relief is fleeting, and soon enough i will be constantly aware of others hearing what i am thinking.
I don't think that this device has been put in anyone else, only me....
Reading back what i have written, it sounds pretty schizophrenic, but has anyone heard of someone called 'dave' from england whoms inner thoughts are read by everyone in the vicinity? Or am just mentally ill? Everyone knows who i am wherever i go, knows my name, and is never suprised to hear my thoughts.