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Follow Up To - My Voices Seem To Be Humans Part Of The Time

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Follow Up To - My Voices Seem To Be Humans Part Of The Time

Postby swilliams » Sat Jan 02, 2021 8:18 am

THis is a follow up to an earlier post on this forum: schizophrenia/topic218326.html - My Voices Seem To Be Humans Part Of The Time

I am surrounded by about 8 people that detest and hate me. One of them is playing 1 bar of music, from a disco song, over, and over, and over and over, and will not stop playing this tiny loop of music. She has already told me that I am going to die listening to a loop of music. A brewed loop they call it. It is 3 to 4 seconds of a piece of a disco song that is looping around, and around, and around, over and over and over, and over. I don't even know how they have abducted my mind. They are saying few words, but I can sense them sitting wherever they are, each in their rooms, hating me intensely. One of them is arranging pornography and get togethers for the others, so they don't feel left out or lonely. In between feeling wanted and well off, they are all sitting intensely concentrating on me, and on how much they hate me.

They are all putting their enmity and hatred into silent thoughts and projecting them into my mind. Every now and then, one of them leaves to have a gay conversation with the girl or boy they are going to have sex with on Wednesday and Thursday night. They control my body, and force me to get up and leave my room to go and smoke cigarette butts that I have to pick up off the ground. They are forcing me to get lung cancer.

They are forcing me to sit in the middle of them all, while they sit and hate me. I got kicked out of narcotics anonymous, because they want to show each other how much they like each other, and one of them arranges for a girl to meet a boy, and be friendly and like each other. I have been told more than 140 times that I am going to die listening to a loop of music, over, and over, and over, and over, and over, as a symbol of how much they all hate me.

I was kicked out of NA because some of them became concerned that I would have some people who didn't hate me, didn't despise me, and said things that were not displays of utter and total contempt. The 4 seconds of the disco song keeps looping over, and over, and over, and over, and they are hating me by invading my mind, and practicing or attempting to make me commit suicide. There is so much contempt and hatred coming into my mind from these people sitting in their respective rooms, at 5am, hating and hating and hating me.

They have been relentlessly imposing their opinion of me for so long now, that it is like being black at a Ku Klux Klan meeting, except for the fact that they are doing it all in secret. They never, never tell anyone else that they spend their spare time, projecting how much they hate me into my mind. In between, they continue to organise their meetings and get togethers, so they can show each other how much they like each other, while this loop of music keeps playing over, and over, and over, in an attempt to make me cry, ten commit suicide. Over the past 30 years, they have made me do things that makes all the people I used to know hate me as well.

They won't let me work, or study, in case I seem to be looking like I might be able to get a job, because they want me broke, and picking up cigarette buts off the ground, so they feel that they have given me lung cancer. I will die with no friends, surrounded by them hating me, having never met anyone that didn’t soon hate me also. They have prevented me from ever meeting a girl that didn't hate me, partly so they feel united in unanimity, about how hate-able I am.
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Re: Follow Up To - My Voices Seem To Be Humans Part Of The Time

Postby TheGangsAllHere » Wed Jan 06, 2021 6:35 am

"Voices" that can take executive control of your body, and who have their own opinions and feelings--those do not sound at all like hallucinations. They sound like alters--dissociated identities. Has anyone ever assessed you for a dissociative disorder rather than assuming that these are symptoms of schizophrenia? The treatment is completely different, so getting an accurate diagnosis would be very important.

You're describing a sense of these identities being in an internal world, doing specific activities, and having their own feelings. Or am I misunderstanding you and you think these are real people external to you who are somehow controlling you? That kind of perception would be more consistent with schizophrenia.
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Re: Follow Up To - My Voices Seem To Be Humans Part Of The Time

Postby MindAnn » Thu Jan 07, 2021 6:52 am

Clearly, you need to seek professional help as this sounds to have intervened with your life. You cannot function well, and that's a sign you need to get this sorted out in the sure and best way possible. Get diagnosed and from there, you could get the treatment you need.
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