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What comforts you?

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What comforts you?

Postby smirks » Sun Dec 02, 2018 4:12 am

I had a thought today that I might not be able to experience comfort.... at the moment anyway.

People....well...obviously that dosen't work.
Nor drugs. Nor alcohol. Nor flattery.

Music used to do it. And sometimes movies or books, but I'm not really someone who can relive comfort through repeatedly watching or reading or listening to something.

Maybe I'm just going through a period of emotional numbness, but I'm certainly looking for some options in the comfort department.
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby Eight » Sun Dec 02, 2018 7:12 am

Here are a few things that work for me:

    a walk in nature without other people around, particularly if there is wildlife

    spending time in my dove aviary

    being with my dogs

    sitting in the sun and really focusing on it's feel on my skin

    putting lotion on my skin; again taking time to actually feel it's touch on my skin and how it soaks in and getting some form of nourishment from that

    listening to a certain form of music (this doesn't always work)

    reading a particular journal I keep -- I keep a journal into which I write or draw things that have struck me as comforting, or tender, or touching, or have offered a bit of sweetness, or some goodness. Not platitudes; but simple observations or thoughts or images or even just a word. Picking up that journal and perusing it's pages nearly always offers me something that helps me, again.
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby xcagedsilhouttex » Sun Dec 02, 2018 7:43 am

Things that I find comforting:

The sound of rain gently pattering, the sound of wind passing through gaps and cracks of a house.

Scent. There is a certain perfume that is particularly soothing however it has been discontinued. One of its main notes is musk.

Being surrounded by fluffy blankets and squashy pillows. The texture against my skin is important. There is a certain type of t-shirt fabric that is particularly pleasing to me.

Related to people: I find massages and fingers being run over my skin and through my hair comforting. Being held against someone and listening to their heartbeat is soothing. If they are wearing a t-shirt with the fabric texture that I like and are pleasantly warm, that's even better. I like someone singing to me and listening to it through their body. Someone talking and listening to their voice while resting my head against their chest.

Music can illicit different responses from me. Most of the time it's euphoric and exciting. I find that artists like Enya and Enigma are comforting.

The only food I find comforting is creamy chicken soup and only when the weather is at a certain point.

Walks and baths are not necessarily comforting but they are soothing.

Looking at the stars is comforting in a way, it makes me feel a part of the universe. I always find comfort in the moon. Walking at night is particularly soothing.
dx: Mixed Personality Disorder (F61)
Anorexia Nervosa (F50)
Substance Abuse (F11)

But if you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the earth. It's just a matter of how you look at it, that's all
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby salles » Sun Dec 02, 2018 8:12 am

Perhaps take comfort from your emotional numbness?
At least it means no pain. Perhaps the discomfort lies in the fact you think you should be feeling this or that. Accept the reality, until another phase comes along.
Having a pet and focusing on them can often shift the energy, for me.
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby emillionth » Mon Dec 03, 2018 4:20 am

Sometimes what it takes to experience comfort is experiencing some extra discomfort first. Something that gives you a chance to feel a sense of mastery over something else, even if it's a minor thing.

If the discomfort is just plain frustrating and you don't feel like you can play any role in making it go away though, then it's no good.
Is this now?
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby smirks » Mon Dec 03, 2018 5:31 am

Thanks everyone for your answers. They really helped because nothing I was trying was working.

I forgot all about walks and nature, but I think I was having a moment of "takes pleasure in few, if any, activities" if you know what I mean. :wink:

I think I was just so stressed that things took a while to kick in. I had a nice little while today where I took some time to make a music playlist and drink a coffee and it was the first time in a little while that I had to myself without the stress of constantly having things to work on.
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby Squaredonutwheels » Mon Dec 03, 2018 7:08 am

I say this in ALL seriousness.
Smelling my armpits comforts me.
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby CityMouse » Mon Dec 03, 2018 5:55 pm

Thoughts comfort me. I don't control the first thought but I control the stream. Solitude is hugely comforting. I hope I can get a loner job. And smoking and coffee is nice too.
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby iabsurdlyexist » Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:56 pm

Solitude, silence, my laptop and a blanket. Warm weather, a porch and a good drink. Lack of responsibility, no pertinent tasks. I can agree that a walk is alright in the right place.
Dx: SPD/AvPD/BP2
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Re: What comforts you?

Postby CityMouse » Mon Dec 03, 2018 11:45 pm

Also, one meal a day in the morning, one cup of coffee in the morning, and holding out hope that I can quit smoking cold turkey buddy. :D
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