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Talking to myself

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Talking to myself

Postby muswrx » Fri Sep 07, 2018 10:16 pm

I have been talking to myself a lot recently. I have always done it to a small extent, but over the past months it has gotten worse. I will talk out loud to people (sometimes people i know, sometimes not, sometimes fictional) and reply to myself in their voice in my head, and react accordingly as if it is a real conversation.
I always used to only do this when I was on my own, but have recently started doing it in front of people and even in public. I used to catch myself doing it and stop, but now I'll do it for God knows how long before I realise, and I have gotten a few weird looks. I will "fog over" and basically have no idea what I am doing.
Does anyone have any advice on how to stop doing this? I am worried it will get worse

[btw i know this isn't really an SPD topic, but I do have SPD and thought someone here might have some relevant advice. Thanks]
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby Holodeck » Sat Sep 08, 2018 1:43 am

I do this. It used to bother me because I'd lose focus. I still do it but I can keep it to myself. The times it crops up now are when I'm stressed or bored. I did this ever since I was a kid and back then I figured out if I looked like I was listening to music I could kinda play it off as if I was muttering the lyrics. Chances are no one believed me but it's the best excuse I could find when it happened. "Look! See? Ear buds! Yeah, totally not people who aren't there!" No one has ever argued though I heard my parents talking about it.

Curious if it annoys you to have to look people in the eye for long.

Do you do talk to yourself more while being active?

Do you feel like if you do other things before a task you'll feel "more ready to do the task"?

Do you work better when it's right before when something is due?

Do you feel better after you've had caffeine or sugar even if you've had a ton of sleep?

If you consume it can you still somewhat easily fall asleep or at least be very relaxed...possibility winding up laying in bed talking and find yourself able to sleep pretty soon after?
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby Floaty73 » Tue Sep 11, 2018 8:55 am

I've always done it. Sometimes I've been caught out. I bet a lot of people have noticed but not said anything. :oops: I've heard it said that "talking to yourself is the first sign of madness". Well, I'm not mad. Just a bit hyper in the thinking department sometimes. I'm surprised more people don't do it.

Often I do it about personal stuff, rehashing old arguments etc, but it can be about external matters. I've been thinking a lot about the US Open women's final (for those of you who follow tennis) and I may well have got a bit too animated when walking down the street discussing that with myself. :?

Occasionally I think of something funny and giggle to myself. That is seen as weird too. Why? What's wrong with reacting to a funny thought? :lol:

However, as it is generally perceived as odd, and I don't want to embarrass my children any more than I already do (without trying), I try to be mindful when I'm out and about, make sure my mouth isn't moving or I'm not pulling faces, etc. I don't want their friends, or their friends' parents, to see me talking to myself. Just stay in the present moment, concentrate on stuff around me, calm down. Which is probably good for my stress levels anyway.
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby muswrx » Tue Sep 11, 2018 5:18 pm

Holodeck wrote:I do this. It used to bother me because I'd lose focus. I still do it but I can keep it to myself. The times it crops up now are when I'm stressed or bored.

This is interesting, because I have had a pretty stressful couple of months. Things are settled now and I haven't been talking to myself as much the past few days, so I'm hopeful that it will sort itself out.
I'll keep your earphone trick in mind though!
As for your questions,
I find it very hard to look people in the eye, I have to look away instantly. I talk to myself equally when I'm at home alone and when I'm active. I definitely work better the night before something is due. I don't eat sugar or caffeine much so i'm not sure.

Floaty73 wrote:rehashing old arguments etc

This is a big one for me. Thought it's often stuff that people have said that I ignored at the time, then I just argue with them in my head.
Floaty73 wrote:Just stay in the present moment, concentrate on stuff around me, calm down. Which is probably good for my stress levels anyway.

Very good advice as well, I will try to do this.

Thank you both, all the best.
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby Holodeck » Wed Sep 12, 2018 4:11 pm

muswrx wrote:As for your questions,
I find it very hard to look people in the eye, I have to look away instantly. I talk to myself equally when I'm at home alone and when I'm active. I definitely work better the night before something is due. I don't eat sugar or caffeine much so i'm not sure.


If all of those questions are answered with yes (like me) then it's a strong possibility you may be making enough dopamine but it's not going to the area of the brain where it's most needed. You'd have to talk to a doctor to know if there's more or less (possibly none at all) to what you've got going on of course. Stimulants push dopamine to those areas. When the brain isn't getting it working properly, it'll try looking for distractions it feels are needed, which of course don't help at all. You might try sipping something like caffeinated tea throughout the day and see if it calms thoughts down for you and helps motivate you. That helps me quite a bit when I need it. Dopamine helps with focus, being awake and motivation. This is the reason some people need their caffeine when they wake up.

Think of it being like clickbait ads making sites longer to load and dopamine being stimulated is adblock.

Don't consume too much though because too much dopamine stimulus can produce anxiety and paranoia. This is why anxiety can make talking to yourself more intense. Anxiety and adrenaline easily go hand in hand and stimulate dopamine but do it in an unpleasant way. Especially if a brain already isn't used to having it at normal levels it will cause the person to try to escape through pleasant dopamine distractions and even play out unpleasant scenarios where they know they are at least in control of their own thoughts. At the same time, this can be very intense and often on the more disturbing end of dissociative thoughts. I get into way more stressful scenarios in my maladaptive daydreams/talking to myself when heavy things are going down in real life.
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby muswrx » Fri Sep 14, 2018 9:44 pm

Holodeck wrote:
muswrx wrote:As for your questions,
I find it very hard to look people in the eye, I have to look away instantly. I talk to myself equally when I'm at home alone and when I'm active. I definitely work better the night before something is due. I don't eat sugar or caffeine much so i'm not sure.


If all of those questions are answered with yes (like me) then it's a strong possibility you may be making enough dopamine but it's not going to the area of the brain where it's most needed. You'd have to talk to a doctor to know if there's more or less (possibly none at all) to what you've got going on of course. Stimulants push dopamine to those areas. When the brain isn't getting it working properly, it'll try looking for distractions it feels are needed, which of course don't help at all. You might try sipping something like caffeinated tea throughout the day and see if it calms thoughts down for you and helps motivate you. That helps me quite a bit when I need it. Dopamine helps with focus, being awake and motivation. This is the reason some people need their caffeine when they wake up.

Think of it being like clickbait ads making sites longer to load and dopamine being stimulated is adblock.

Don't consume too much though because too much dopamine stimulus can produce anxiety and paranoia. This is why anxiety can make talking to yourself more intense. Anxiety and adrenaline easily go hand in hand and stimulate dopamine but do it in an unpleasant way. Especially if a brain already isn't used to having it at normal levels it will cause the person to try to escape through pleasant dopamine distractions and even play out unpleasant scenarios where they know they are at least in control of their own thoughts. At the same time, this can be very intense and often on the more disturbing end of dissociative thoughts. I get into way more stressful scenarios in my maladaptive daydreams/talking to myself when heavy things are going down in real life.


A lot of this makes sense to me. It certainly seems that my increase in talking to myself was thanks to stress/anxiety. Thank you so much for your insight.
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby Eight » Sat Sep 15, 2018 3:42 am

Floaty73 wrote:I've been thinking a lot about the US Open women's final (for those of you who follow tennis) and I may well have got a bit too animated when walking down the street discussing that with myself. :?


Many women, and particularly women of color, are walking down the street, animated and speaking out to themselves about the US Women's Open tennis final.

Those who aren't might need to examine their reality :lol:
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby smirks » Sat Sep 15, 2018 6:13 pm

You can always suck on a hard candy to keep your mouth from doing the motor movements associated with talking outloud to yourself. It might be easier than fixing the neurological reasons you talk out loud.
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby Holodeck » Sat Sep 15, 2018 7:50 pm

Tried it. It made me make those mouth movements when nervous. Now when I get anxious, I'll sometimes chew gum that's not in my mouth. :|
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Re: Talking to myself

Postby Sorrowfell » Sun Sep 16, 2018 8:22 am

I do that when i'm playing out an imaginary scenario in my head. Usually it's only the angry dialogue and curse words that i say out loud.
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