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my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

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my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby sprock » Sun Apr 26, 2020 7:47 pm

I'm really cut-up about this and it's left me feeling very sullied and tainted and this has led to some strained upset conversations with my partner who feels I'm over-reacting. However, I think that - even inadvertently - I have crossed a line, potentially into bestiality due to my own stupidity.

Basically, I sleep naked with only my partner and myself in her house. In the morning the dogs were barking and she asked me to go and let them out. Because I intended to go back to bed or get washed I went into the living room naked to open their hutches... I'm //really/ not a dog person and have always actually been quite scared of them so they act up around me. However, I have made a real effort to be helpful around the house and that includes doing things for the dogs.

I let out the first of the dogs who is a small poodle-terrier cross-breed (or something like that). She went over to the back door, but when I went to unlock it she suddenly jumped into the air at me (she's really springy - alarmingly so) and I felt a horrible wetness against my genitals. I don't know if this was her nose or her tongue (I hope the former though fear the latter) but, despite only being for a split-second, this is still inappropriate sexual contact with an animal.

I immediately jumped back, opened the door to let her out, then shut it quickly behind me. My partner was a bit startled and upset for me when I told her what had happened, but also found it funny. She doesn't seem to grasp how I feel it is a terrible moral transgression. I'm also worried that I don't be able to continue having a healthy sexual relationship with my partner because of the intrusive image of the dog and my feelings of taintedness.

I wanted to get a sense of whether people here think I did something really wrong. I've certainly learned my lesson about being naked in a room with an animal. I've never owned an animal myself and have never lived with a dog before in my defence.
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby helpfulteacup » Sun Apr 26, 2020 8:25 pm

This isn't something you did on purpose, and so I don't think you have anything to be worried about.
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby jaus tail » Mon Apr 27, 2020 3:46 am

you havent ruined the dogs life. this helps me deal with my remorse toward other people that i havent ruined the other person's life.
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby sprock » Mon Apr 27, 2020 10:16 am

helpfulteacup wrote:This isn't something you did on purpose, and so I don't think you have anything to be worried about.


Thanks. This is true, but the same could be said of a drunk or speeding driver who accidentally kills someone, I fear. I recognise these aren't exactly the same in consequence, but maybe in terms of the severity of how such a crime is perceived and its taboo nature.
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby Ixion » Mon Apr 27, 2020 2:19 pm

I hope this doesn't sound dismissive, and comes across as I intend it, but this sounds to me like a really good example of something that completely isn't a transgression, and only feels like one to you because you're prone to view the events of your own life with a more negative viewpoint.

I wouldn't even put this in the same ballpark as sexual contact with an animal, an animal touched you, by mistake, in an embarassing place and you immediately ended the situation. The dog wasn't harmed or made to do anything, the situation wasn't sexual for you and certainly wasn't for the dog.

I know what you're saying about intent not being a get out card for everything you do wrong, but in your examples negligence has resulted in real harm, but this situation lacks both harm, intent, and a sexual context. You didn't hurt or abuse a dog, it jumped at you while you were undressed. This could have happened in any room of the house at any time.

I know it's hard to forgive yourself when chronic remorse is a problem, but seriously ask yourself, if someone who'd done exactly what you did in this situation posted here, what would you think?
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby avatar123 » Sat May 02, 2020 5:58 am

Totally agree with others here, neither you nor the dog had any thought of sexual contact, she just jumped out of excitement. Could have landed anywhere. No relation between thought/action and result.

Although not relevant to this incident, dogs do sometimes crotch-sniff with people, just as they butt-sniff with other dogs. They get a wealth of information from this, it's their version of Facebook. My animal shelter friends refer to it jokingly as Buttbook. They can tell something about age, gender, health, and recent diet, as well as creating a scent ID they can easily remember & recognize. A dog's nose is incredibly sensitive.

I'm sure they can do something similar with humans. So if she was to actively poke her nose there, you can understand it for what it is, and not feel guilty about it. To us it's gross, to them it's natural, innocent and informative.
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby HSS » Thu May 07, 2020 12:44 pm

It's really an ordinary accident, moreover with no purpose.
I would focus on what your concern is messaging. I think it's a metaphorical message, and it could be a sign that you need to recover an harmony with your instinctive, animal part without judging it.
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby sprock » Mon May 11, 2020 9:49 am

Thanks everyone and particularly to HSS as I think that's really perceptive.
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Re: my partner's dog licked/ nosed my genitals

Postby HSS » Thu May 14, 2020 4:12 pm

Thanks to you @sprock, I am glad that I have been useful. :D
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