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I am a bully to my 12 year old step son

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I am a bully to my 12 year old step son

Postby wowyf » Fri Nov 02, 2018 12:41 am

ughhhh, hate to admit that. But I realize I am an emotional and verbal bully to him. I feel so much regret for it, but something about him really makes me want to cut him down and "put him in his place." I don't ever physically hit him, just mental and emotional, little comments etc, but that doens't make it any less worse. He has a lot of emotional issues, insecurity, etc and I find myself trying to "tough love" him which is a vestige left over from my dad (don't get me started there). Ultimatley I know I"m jus tmaking it worse for him, I wish I could just let him be who he is, but I just want him to IMPROVE his mentality, but I don't know how. I do build him up...

I'm sorry for being such a jerk, I just had to get it off my chest, maybe there are others can relate. What a slap in the face it is to realize sometimes the bully is ME.
wowyf
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Re: I am a bully to my 12 year old step son

Postby sprock » Sun Nov 04, 2018 7:34 pm

That sucks, but it's good you've recognised it in yourself as I think most people simply wouldn't have the self-insight to do so. Are there any activities you could do together which you might enjoy and allow you to appreciate his strengths and be less bothered by his flaws?
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Re: I am a bully to my 12 year old step son

Postby wowyf » Sun Nov 04, 2018 8:51 pm

sprock, that's an excellent question. I think doing an activity where I am enamored by his strengths would be really good. I love watching him shine. I'll have a think on that.
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