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Guilt OCD

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Guilt OCD

Postby warriorwarrior » Wed Jun 06, 2018 8:10 am

Dear Guys,

This is the first time I write on a forum about my situation which my doctor calls OCD. Please don't judge and please give useful advice. Two or three years ago I became a friend with a married woman on Facebook. I never saw here in my life and we even did not open webcam to each other. But the woman had lots of friend on FB and she said she likes talking to man and most guys on her account generally liked her profile selfie pictures. She said she likes being like that. As a man, I was impressed by her behaviours and I said to her some compliments like "you are beautiful", your eyes are beautiful","you are sexy", "my baby", "how about meeting in the future". She said we can meet. But later I thought that this is unethical and I said to her I do not want to meet her in my real life. Our conversation did not go beyond writing on keyboard. She said "ok, no problem." Nearly 1 year later, I heard that that woman died in a surgery because of blood clot. She had been taken to hospital due to ulcerative perforration in her intestines and leter she had died during the operation. When I heard that, I felt guilty.My bran said to me she had died because of you, because of the fact that she had fallen in loe with you. I searched finding some evidences and compulsions to relieve me. I found nothing but the fact that the woman went on her life without disturbing me and writing me at all. During that time,her facebook friends doubled and she put new selfie photos on FB and talked to other guys. These evidences relieved me for some time but it still started circulating in my bind that I am guilty. What do you think about this situation? Please help me. Most importantly, when I was talking to that woman, I also started my real relationship with my gf. That's why I never went on onversation with her and I cut it before being dangerous. I also feel guilty if I cheated my gf or not. Please help me. I need your ruminations :) I am joking just useful advice if you have.

Thank you.
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Re: Guilt OCD

Postby shock_the_monkey » Thu Jun 07, 2018 2:09 pm

if there's anything underpinning your guilt, i'd guess that you feel that you were unkind to her. but that certainly didn't cause her death. as to being unfaithful to your girlfriend, clearly you weren't. in life we have to make choices, and sometimes those choices aren't easy. if you ask me, i'd say that you made the right choice here. that this woman died in surgery is just unfortunate. nothing more.
something knocked me out' the trees
now i'm on my knees
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

there is one thing you must be sure of
i can't take any more
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

don't like it but i guess i'm learning

... shock the monkey to life
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Re: Guilt OCD

Postby Snaga » Thu Jun 07, 2018 3:54 pm

^^ what wise Monkey-san said. There's really nothing more to add to it. I understand where you're coming from, because I see Divine Retribution for my actions, everywhere. But when you stand outside of the situation, no, you're not to blame for anything. In fact, I'd say it looks as if from her side, you were one of many guys she liked flirting, maybe messing around, with. There were more where you came from, as you said yourself about her facebook having even more male admirers. I suspect, for her it was the game of attraction that she enjoyed. And then she died. As we're all going to, someday. Unfortunately for her, it was an unlucky series of events, that weren't tied to your talking to her on social media. And as for your g/f, you didn't do any more than talk a little trash, and that's when you seem to have been just starting out with a steady- this isn't like a married man, going around behind his wife's back having one night stands. You got flirty. It happens. You cut it off when it got out of hand. The end.
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Re: Guilt OCD

Postby warriorwarrior » Sun Jun 10, 2018 10:16 pm

Thank you very much for both the comments helping me find the light. I appreciate. Thank you again.
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