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The 7 Stages of Grief after the end of a relationship

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Re: The 7 Stages of Grief after the end of a relationship

Postby benjoy » Thu Apr 02, 2020 4:47 am

I have not experienced all of these stages. I think this is due to insecure attachment.
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Re: The 7 Stages of Grief after the end of a relationship

Postby migeltr » Fri Jun 05, 2020 5:54 pm

Thanks.Very informative thread. How about if its platonic love or friendship?
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Re: The 7 Stages of Grief after the end of a relationship

Postby legalboxers » Mon Sep 28, 2020 8:47 pm

Im not sure if this goes in this section, Im sorry if its not, but maybe someone please can help me.
I met her during the start of this covid. She said she was going through a rough time. It was a few days before valentines day. We started talking more, and watching a tv show together on the phone. She also took care of her mom. And her 4 cats (I grew close to them)

We would talk on the phone all night. At this time, she would have issues with her hot water heater. Many outbursts, yelling at me - projecting as the term is I am assuming. This would go on for 2 weeks Im guessing.

With Covid going on, alot of cancellations of events were going on. Some of which I attended. So we still talked on the phone. She wanted to meet, I thought ok. So she gave me her work address. Didnt know why but for some reason I had an idea of where she lived without the work address. So around the final week of march I get a phone call from her that her mom wasnt breathing. So I told her to call 911, I was at her house maybe 4 hours later. My mom wanted to come with me since she wanted to go shopping.

I was at the hospital with her. I did not go in with her, because of covid (I should have - but my mom being an RN of 55 yrs, and aged herself, suggested I should not) Her mom died a few hours later. When I took her back home to drop things off, I took her food shopping and to the liquor store. She was thankful to me.

Two days later, her mom was to be cremated, again I was not able to go due to Covid (my mother needed me home) as I was doing dishes my ex fiancee from way back messaged me to cause problems. I told her to please leave me alone (This was strike one to her - A TEXT ON THE WORST DAY OF HER LIFE). And she got mad at me as well because I did not go with her to pick up her ashes.

Sometime after was her birthday. We had bad rains and a tornado warning. I could not move my car due to downed trees in the area. She did not believe me and was like "you could of come seen me, it was my first birthday without my mom. I made the attempt. But - again, I could not get out of my driveway (not understanding).

The following day - I would spend 2-3 days with her. I could not stay in her house since they were fleas in her bed, and her house smelled of cat litter, and urine.

I would spend the nights in the hotel (which I paid for) watch 90 day fiancee with her (I cant watch that anymore because of her, I cry) So one of these days/nights I was with her. I got a text message from my bank telling me someone hacked my card. As this was going on, my friend was calling me non stop needing to talk to me. I told them I was with someone. I told them I was with my fiancee (yeah I jumped the gun but its 2020, with all what was going on I didnt want to die alone, or be alone,I thought she loved me) I went back home to get a change of clothes the following morning and went back to take her food shopping. My friend kept on texting me. She got mad at that. because I didnt tell them where to do (and this person only calls me when they needed something, anytime else she dont call).

The final strike was when my friend who has stage 3 breast cancer messaged me. She flipped at this point and was going through my phone and seen I sent her a picture, on Feb 12th - 2 days BEFORE she and I were in a relationship). She said "Your not my person" I want no memories of you. And threw a metal can of deodorant at my head, and beat me with her charging cable to her phone.

During the nights I wasnt with her she would treat me like $#%^, only be nice to me the days she would see me. And at night she would cry "I want to be with my mommy, I want to be with my grandma" crying..

I did everything I could. I dont know or how to feel. I feel my life has been upended. This was the oly relationship I was in, where I felt whole. :cry:

Not to mention, the day I told her "you can do what you want" - 12 hours later she posts a pic of some new guy.

A few days ago,she calls me and blames me for something I have no connection with, the wants to talk to my mom (as her MAN told her to) to say how I did nothing for her, even though I paid for the pizza and wine the nights I was with her, gave her some of my cherished stuffed animals (She said she wanted no memory of me - but wears the bras I got for her, a dunder miffin shirt, and security shirt she wanted, paid for someone to clean up her front and back lawn, to fix her fuses in her house, and got cat food and cat litter, and a fan for her room.

:( *sigh*.......
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