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When to let go for good.....

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When to let go for good.....

Postby ctlguy260 » Mon Feb 08, 2021 11:07 pm

I am wrestling with a question. When do you know how and after a breakup when there are still feelings?

My GF and I just split after 3 months 2 weeks ago. We are both in out mid 40s and I know this may sound cliche but this was the quickest and easiest connection I have ever had. We joked about how we connected from the very first sentence the night we met. We constantly laughed and she told me that she missed me every day we didnt see other which was only a few days a week. We did some cool trips together in a short time and she always was wanting to plan the next one. She always loved and respected being open and honest with one another and It was something she needed most in a relationship......we when I was. I admitted that I was in debt with the IRS and spent what I had saved to barely scratch the surface to getting out the whole because stupid business decisions I made.

A lot of it took her by surprise and she said it ok but a lot to process and she needed some time to think. Ultimately she said that she couldnt move forward because she needed to be with someone who is financially secure. Her marriage ended because of money and she does some real estate on the side now and has allamony/child support. The thing was it wasnt about the amount of money I have as a I have a great secure job but she doesnt want to go through the same thing. The actual part I liked about her she wasnt into money or material things but it was the security of it. She was kind of an old soul/hippie so the most important thing really was about the connection and how you feel around someone. That was supper strong but I hated that what came between us did.

Where it stands now is we have talked briefly and she has stated that she stands by what she feels in her heart but agreed to at least sit down and talk some more. I know it was a delay or a easy let down and today she said it would just bring those emotions to the surface because she has never ended things with someone she had feelings for but hopes we can be friends and have drinks occasionally.

Although I respect her feelings but the fact that there are still feelings between us how do you just let go of all hope? I hear her but damn its hard to believe it. Anyone else experienced that?
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Re: When to let go for good.....

Postby Papagoat69 » Thu Mar 25, 2021 11:13 am

I never experienced what you are going through, but I’m a little concerned about the way this relationship ended . Something doesn’t seem right . She’s not materialistic but the fact that you owe money to the IRS is a deal breaker for her ? I bet she owes money to a bank for her mortgage and or car !

Anyway, it’s hard to move forward, especially when you feel you met someone special, but try to stay grounded. It’s only been a few months and this issue comes up . It’s ok , it’s just proof that the relationship wasn’t that strong.
How to move on ... put your energy into a something you love doing ,or something that needs doing , home repair, or maybe a part time job. Just keep yourself busy and focus on You .
You’ll get through this . Stay strong!
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