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My boyfriend is a creep. I'm trying to make sense of this

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My boyfriend is a creep. I'm trying to make sense of this

Postby CookieClicker21 » Tue Sep 03, 2019 12:35 am

This might sound rude but the truth is, he's always been the shy, nerdy boy who couldn't get girls. Basically the horny nice boy who gets friendzoned... I found it enduring.

We got close as friends. After a while of him trying to win me over, we started dating. We've been together for 2 years now.

My last relationship left me feeling extremely insecure about myself. Because of this, my boyfriend now did everything he could to make me feel good- took sexy pics of me all the time, would text to tell me he's looking at them and how I'm hot. He's very affectionate, kind, and selfless.

The other day he got caught taking creepshots of a customer at work. He was fired for it. He did it twice in a row. He didn't attempt to talk to either girl, just took quick butt shots as both walked by.

After finally coming clean to me and a lot of talking, he admitted that he is a bit of a creep. He said it was just a habit from his younger days- that he wants nothing to do with those girls and he just wanted to "look longer."

Another thing i should add is he is 5 years younger than me (he's 24). We also are semi long distance, meaning we only have sex once or twice a week, and from my past, i have issues with even enjoying sex.. In short, we have sex issues.

So I don't blame him for watching porn on days he doesn't see me. Big deal, all guys do it. Plus i know he still looks at pics he takes of me (he has hundreds..). But taking a pic of a real person makes it seem cheaty to me?

I realize there is whole nother legal side to this, but for the record he was caught (by the person!), they complained, and he was fired.

Morality and legality aside, I'm just trying to understand the mindset of a horny boy who is a bit of a creep.

He says he knew it was creepy but never saw it as a violation to the women or to me, he just thought of it as a way to get off. He said when he jacks off he watches my videos/photos mostly but about a quarter of the time he likes watching porn. And sometimes for his porn he takes a pic of a stranger (I'm guessing he uses it on a right place/right time basis. Like if a hot girl is alone in the store isle with him, he figures why not?) He says he deletes them when he's done jerking off to them and that he's never shared any online nor wanted to (and i believe him on that).

I broke up with him but he really wants to make things right with me. In all other regards, he was an extremely outstanding boyfriend. But now i feel like I wasn't enough for him, and it's taken a blow to my already-damaged self esteem. He said he didn't consider this as cheating, but in a way, I do. I'm trying to understand his mindset to put my own mind at peace. I truly believe he is a good person at heart and I'm trying to not hate him right now
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Re: My boyfriend is a creep. I'm trying to make sense of this

Postby Aries411 » Wed Sep 04, 2019 3:23 am

Welcome to the forum Cookie,

When you describe your previous boyfriend, he sounds like a pretty good guy since he treated you well, but it also sounds like he has a fetish of taking pictures / videos of strangers. It is true that taking these kinda of pictures are illegal due to the invasion of privacy and unfortunately the thing that he is into, crosses into that domain. Fetishes can be harmless, but if they aren't controlled it can lead to an addiction which it can affect different aspects of that person's life. I am not sure if he is addicted to taking these pictures or maybe the events were exaggerated in your mind since he was caught. I think you would have a better idea about that.
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