Our partner

Imagine a relationship

Open Discussions about Relationship Issues.

Moderator: xdude

Imagine a relationship

Postby Torill » Sun Aug 11, 2019 9:45 am

..where one helps the other evolve a lot emotionally. The 'under-evolved' lets their guard down a lot and hands over a lot of power.

Then when (for good or bad reasons) he/she gets the idea the other has let him/her down and isn't worth the trust -

he/she makes a show of unraveling all of the person they in common have built him/her up to be. Acts as shameful and low as possible. Like, self-denigrating. I'm not sure what they're saying with it. It's to burn the bridge while they have the nerve perhaps. I have bits I can go on with that you don't know. I'll sacrifice anything to be free of you. Look what you loved, what embarrassing judgement.

My question is: is it a he or she? Both parties, and both the relationship and the way the one person reacts and ends it. Is there a more likely gender?
Torill
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 5
Joined: Sat Jan 21, 2017 5:45 pm
Local time: Fri Aug 23, 2019 2:10 am
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Re: Imagine a relationship

Postby xdude » Sun Aug 11, 2019 3:42 pm

Hey Torill,

I am not sure I understood your question, but from what I think I understand...

I don't know everyone, so all I can go on is my own experiences. From what I have seen though, what you seem to be writing about is a cluster B type reaction to a loss of trust, a complete devaluation of the other. As far as I know, that is not gender specific.
We do NOT delete posts

Read the forum rules before posting here. If you are having any doubts about what you are posting, if you are thinking in the back of your mind, "I am going to want to delete this, or these details, later", remove those details, or step back and don't post until you are sure.
xdude
Site Admin
 
Posts: 7713
Joined: Thu Dec 23, 2010 3:41 pm
Local time: Thu Aug 22, 2019 8:10 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Imagine a relationship

Postby Taramafor » Wed Aug 14, 2019 4:39 pm

Trust issues have nothing to do with gender. It has to do with past experience. Though if someone has bad experience only with one gender it can be easy to see the worse. More importantly it had to do with fear. Either of others (which is obvious) or ourselves (the not so obvious).

Therefor I ask if you care enough to remain around in hard times where mistrust is lacking. Likewise I wonder the same about whoever you struggling with. Note that this is different then "seeing the worse of each other". Of which can be either be honest or people seeing only the worst that isn't true (that's where it gets technical. Long story short, honesty and reasons combined with action and reaction).

I should probably point out some people have a habit of mistrusting yet can hate themselves for having irrational fears (again, regardless of gender. Seen plenty in both). Some people struggle more then others. The trick is finding out if it's something you did or something they're simply afraid of in general. Some people also hate more easily then others when they feel mistrusted. Be understanding or don't.
Taramafor
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Sep 15, 2017 9:32 pm
Local time: Fri Aug 23, 2019 1:10 am
Blog: View Blog (0)


Return to Relationship Forum




  • Related articles
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 19 guests