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Looking for a mother figure as an adult

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Looking for a mother figure as an adult

Postby Rosey32 » Mon Jul 24, 2017 4:17 pm

Well this is my first post so bear with me. I am trying to find literature about a female that is always looking for a mother figure. It is not a romantic attachment, but an emotional one. I did not know others have the same problem. I can't continue to live like this so I am going full barrel trying to get help. If anyone can show me where to look next it will be most appreciated. :roll:
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Re: Looking for a mother figure as an adult

Postby Wally58 » Tue Jul 25, 2017 7:53 am

I'm sure that there is a term for it. There is comfort and security in having a Matriarchal figure around.
I lost my mom a few years ago and listen to the advice and consul of the 'wise elderly women' at work. They seem to know how things work around here and certainly as much as the graybeards.
Isis was a goddess of motherhood and magic. There were others.
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Re: Looking for a mother figure as an adult

Postby SarahT » Mon Jul 31, 2017 10:15 am

I'm in the same situation. I'm constantly looking for either a father figure or mother. I don't source this in everyone I meet. It's very selective. But, if found that without a proper support network of family, even some people I've made friends with I've seen the attachment traits come up. It suffocates them and they can't take it. After doing some research I think the correct term is anxious-preoccupied attachment disorder. I have diagnosed borderline personality disorder and the two seem to go hand in hand.
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Re: Looking for a mother figure as an adult

Postby AmberCat » Tue Aug 01, 2017 3:09 pm

Ive been searching for a mother my entire life. I never really got on with my own, I had a very chaotic childhood, she wasn't malicious, I felt she meant well, but she just never was a parental figure, she was more like a rather chaotic friend who confused me, and then when she met my stepdad and had more kids, just plain neglect as she couldn't really deal with so many. All my life I was afraid to let her in-I would brush off injuries if she was around as I didn't want her sympathy, never tell her anything and reject all attempts at affection except for an awkward side hug at birthdays or at Christmas. Despite all this I was quite a desperate attention seeker with everyone else.

At school I would like whichever teacher I knew I could get to give me attention, but anyone would do. As a teenager I befriended women my mother's age over the internet.

I feel quite lucky now, because I have found what I have been looking for my entire life. I have a mother, I happened to meet a kind lady who is about 30 years older than me. She pretty much treats me as an extra daughter.
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