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Open Discussions About Rape Trauma Syndrome.


Postby Nofacegirl » Wed Sep 13, 2017 6:20 pm

I need to know if anyone else goes thru anything like this or if it's just me..
although I don't remember 99.9% of it, we've pieced together that I was drugged for the 4 days I was held. They apparently farmed me out to people they had come to my house as well as taking me to other places for the same thing. The drugs wore off about 3-4 days later and found myself covered in bruises, and robbed. I can barely remember anything and what I do remember is just a Polaroid picture here and there and a quick memory of something someone said. Even though I don't remember it I'm having seriously bad panic attacks and anxiety attacks. I can't think straight I start stuttering and I don't make sense my husband says physically I look like I'm having a seizure while I'm pacing around and even now I'm getting all jittery Just thinkin about it and my heart is in my stomach. I can't even talk to my doctor about my meds he gives me for it without shaking I feel like I'm going nuts and even asked my councilor if I should have myself put in the hospital cuz of how bad I get and how easy it is to set things off. I get shaley on and off every day, not a day goes by without multiple panic and anxiety attacks and this happens right about a year ago. Am I losin it or is there anyone anywhere that's done this??
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Postby salted lipstick » Sun Sep 17, 2017 12:57 pm

Hello and welcome to the forum.

You aren't losing it. Reactions like what you describe can be normal for survivors of trauma. I get the shakey thing too sometimes so I can relate to how out of control and horrible that feels.

Even if you hadn't been drugged, the mind has a way of cordoning off memories about trauma so that you can't just remember them normally. Trauma can be dissociated or repressed so that you can't remember normally. Then the memories or flashbacks can come back to you when triggers happen. It sounds like some of what you are recalling is being recalled this way...

I'm sorry to hear about what you went through. It's really good that you have reached out and have some professional support available to you. How are you going with that so far?
In a way, I am not defined by my dissociation. In a way, I am.

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