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Promiscuity after being sexually abused.

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Promiscuity after being sexually abused.

Postby anonymouswom » Mon Nov 04, 2019 11:08 pm

I was abused when I was a child. After the abuse, I began to be interested in sex, I wanted to touch my sister's genitals, I would watch porn and spend all day on the internet talking to paedophiles and showing myself in the webcam to them, I would play bizarre sexual games on the internet etc. When I was 16, my dad started slapping my ass and showing a side of him I have never seen, I knew without a shadow of doubt that I was being sexually assaulted again, and then the promiscuity appeared again. I started having intrusive sexual thoughts, for example: me having sex with my dad, or aliens, or corpses. I noticed that everytime had these thoughts, I felt this physical thing in my vagina. I also feel it when I hear my father's voice. Today I was thinking about how my mother always lies to me and I felt this physical feeling in my vagina again. So apparently it doesn't happen only when I'm thinking about sex. Because it happened today while I was thinking about how my mother lies compulsively to me.
I also feel a constant fear of looking at my father's genitals when I'm close to him.
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Re: Promiscuity after being sexually abused.

Postby anonymouswom » Mon Nov 04, 2019 11:20 pm

Also, I have masturbated/fantasized about my father, criminals and children. :(

-- Mon Nov 04, 2019 9:21 pm --

I'm not sure if this post is ok in here, I think it would go better in the paraphilias forum. Sorry.
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Re: Promiscuity after being sexually abused.

Postby Snaga » Tue Nov 05, 2019 6:11 am

I'm not so sure we're talking about a discrete paraphilia, so we're okay, for now- the Paras forum being locked, and paraphilias being unfortunately off the table for discussion, as a main subject, anywhere in Psych Forums.

From what I understand, and what goes on in my own brain, I don't think your experience is all that unusual...

I'll address the quasi-paras bit, first. I don't think merely thinking about children (along with your dad and assorted baddies) is necessarily a desire for children in the real world. I think some of that might simply be tied up with that you were sexually abused as a child.

Now, the vagina things...

Over in the OCD forum there's a lot of to-do amongst the folks with sexual fears/obsessions (being Gay, or being a pedo) that revolves around 'groinal responses'. Which, from everything I've heard, has more to do with anxiety, than sexual desire. And you might be exhibiting a good example of that. When I'm arguing the point in that forum (I'm also the OCD mod and quite OCD, myself) I use myself as an illustration- I can for example, have my hands on some machinery where they certainly should not be (unless I just wish to get it broken, or worse) and right before I know I should move them, if I wait a moment longer than is wise, I get a not unpleasant sensation in the nethers. My nethers, being boy bits. It's not sexual arousal, but it's a quite pleasant tingle of sorts- if it was detached from the circumstance that caused it. I mean, I can just about produce that sensation on demand by placing myself at risk in certain situations (not advisable, just an observation). It's clearly not sexual but I think it's caused by that sudden adrenaline or anxiety of something bad gonna happen. So... yeah. I agree and can confirm that the vaginal sensation isn't necessarily sexual in nature.
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