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Suicidal Craving

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Suicidal Craving

Postby Jdaddyrox » Sun Jun 23, 2019 2:33 pm

A smile and a laugh
Your life must be great
The belongings you have
The family your full cup and plate
But past the shell and thick thick skin
Lies a cold black darkness deep within
It’s like a black jellybean covered in cake icing
Outside is beautiful but inside is writhing
With hate, darkness and despair, thoughts of death
Nothing brings me joy and love is nonexistent
I wish I could shrivel and die and end this living nightmare.

-- Sun Jun 23, 2019 9:35 am --

-- Sun Jun 23, 2019 9:38 am --

Sorry for the excessive profanity on this one, it’s just how I feel.

“The END”

Born into society's cesspool
Molded into a model citizen
Totally against ones will
Your life was lived before you were ever born
###$ this place ###$ your God ###$ everything that ever existed ###$ it ALL ###$ it ALL ###$ IT ALL
Guided down the halls of life
Shown the path shown the way
Pointed towards society's goal
Forced to take the righteous path
End this Hell End this life End this suffering Please show me the end because I can no longer persist
Follow the plan laid out for you
Here have some bits of fun
Mixed in a world of misery
Do as you are made to do you ######6 caged up rat
###$ these chains ###$ this cell ###$ Everything that's Anything
Pushed along and guided through
Your life is just a wasted death
Excrement of society
Lied to cheated raped and plundered
Hell is not a foreign place
Lost forever time craved no more
No one cares for one another
Love is such a grand old lie
Feel the darkness coming on
No one cares no one cares no one ever ######6 cared, it's all been a ######6 LIE so now I lay me down to die, ###$ IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-- Sun Jun 23, 2019 9:40 am --

That's it I've had it
From blackness I came and back to black I'll go
There's pain in this world that no one should have to know
Just as my mom regrets me being born I'm glad to die my soul is worn
Forget all this livin' and life's hell
Deep down I know it's time to quit it
From pain to depression and hate to aggression my tool for death I've made my selection
So turn it on let's get this thing started and put an end to this failing
My light of hope has burned too dim
Life is drab and plain as water tastes when ones not thirsty
I'm just done, so done , it's over please let it all go away and stop Forever
Flick the Switch
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Re: Suicidal Craving

Postby Jdaddyrox » Sun Jun 23, 2019 2:44 pm

My Friend Depression

So I've got this friend
And he's never far away
I can always count on him
To be there every day
No need to call
I know he's there
He helps make sure
I live in despair
Sometimes I grieve
Or wish I'd just die
The sun doesn't shine
And I don't know why
But I'll bet you one thing
It's for goddamn sure
My friends a comin
And there's no cure
I feel his presence
His weight on my shoulders
No miracles from a god
As my heart just grows colder
I wish time would stop
And my troubled mind with it
Surely it will one day
And my friend will be gone and so will I
Death will set us all free from misery when it unplugs life's cord
Then my friend will leave
Not to return
And find another’s
Soul to burn

-- Sun Jun 23, 2019 9:47 am --

So I’ve seen a therapist and he just sits and listens to my problems. I’m looking for solutions to my problems not just someone to listen so what should I do? I really don’t want meds with either.
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Re: Suicidal Craving

Postby Tyler » Sun Jun 23, 2019 3:00 pm

These are very nice poems. As a writer, suffering is gets me going and I pour out my best stuff with it, but it always hurts me in the end.

For help with your depression, at least on this website, I'd recommending going to the depression forum depression/
Email me if you want a doughnut
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Diagnosed: Schizoaffective Disorder Bi-polar type Rapid Cycling.

Medication: Geodone 160 MG, Lexapro 5mg

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Re: Suicidal Craving

Postby Wally58 » Fri Jun 28, 2019 11:43 am

I used to write very sad poetry. It was me crying inside. I called it 'woetry'. Artistic expression helped to pull up the feelings that I wouldn't have felt otherwise.
It was a stress relief. It made me human again. I was able to process and to recover myself and where I was at that moment through my art.
"Suicidal Craving" may have been entertained at the time, but I decided that I didn't want to do what couldn't be undone.
Best of luck to you. :D
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