Thinking about paraphilias

I'm sorry to hear that this forum is closing down. Somehow this forum is unique. There are other places, where pedophiles exchange opinions, but this is the place where the more sober, scientific oriented people exchange ideas.

My explanation of paraphilias in general is based on the role instincts are playing or are supposed to play. Typically for humans is that instincts are not strong and are not dominating the behavior. Sometimes they interfere with normal behavior like in the fear of flying. At other times they are necessary, but get prevented by environment. Since boys behave irrational during puberty, albeit in a consistent way - i assume that this is very much an innate behavior like the fear of flying. Moreover, going in this manner seems to be necessary for the psycho-sexual development. If one stuns the weak impulses further, then one might not end up liking women at all. Too many obstacles are put in the way of boys in puberty. Somehow, this backfires. Not only do i think of the sexual repressive society, but also the influence overprotective mothers have on their sons. It is known that many homosexuals have a weak father and a dominant mother, also there is a more older brothers hypothesis. There could be more to it than just a few antibodies. Younger brothers observe all the obstacles with chasing girls and might not be enticed to do the same.

Evolution has made human instincts weaker and weaker up to the point where they become too weak. All papers i have read so far about it, seem to confirm this.

It is known that many homosexuals have a weak father and a dominant mother, also there is a more older brothers hypothesis.

You talk like Joseph Nicolosi Did you have conversation with him or with other psychologists affiliated with NARTH about paraphilias? If I lived in the USA I would seriously consider going through treatment with him or with other providers of the reparative therapy, although this method has minimal scientific base. I work with my sexuality myself with support from the internet, and I can say this work is moderately successful. I have strengthened my male identity and have optimized cognitive schemes in sexual sphere of life. My goal is not overcoming of paraphilia but simple improving my life. Setting unrealistic goals is very harmful.

Kirill wrote:

It is known that many homosexuals have a weak father and a dominant mother, also there is a more older brothers hypothesis.

You talk like Joseph Nicolosi

Or like Stephen Fry. He referred to that opinion in his Gay world documentary and commented that is was true for him too.

I think it could be a contributing factor, but i don't think there is much weight attached to this cause. If paraphilias are like a derailment of "normal" heterosexual development, then this "derailment" happens due to the combined impact of several factors. In a derailment, the wheel has to jump, the rail could be defects, the boggie is moving wrong, some damping is not in place and so on. I think it's the same with pedophilia and other paraphilia, there is a neurological cause for instincts being weak, less defense against a dominating mother and other sexual repressive influences. All those causes working against the manifestation of a "normal" relationship pattern. And weak instincts are a big part of it.

It's sad that this forum closes and i can't exchange more opinions with you. Happy Christmas or similar!