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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby weepingwillow » Wed Apr 03, 2013 1:37 pm

Hey,

How are you? Are you feeling any better?

I'm not too bad thank you. Still not great but a little bit better today. It just seems to be taking forever to lift this time. I haven't been able to get an apt with my GP yet but i'm seeing my CPN on Monday.
I have an assessment with the Eating Disorders Team on Tuesday too. I'm really nervous about it but hopefully they can help me.

((Big Hugs)) to you
Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne
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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby CrackedGirl » Wed Apr 03, 2013 6:52 pm

weepingwillow wrote:Hey,

How are you? Are you feeling any better?

I'm not too bad thank you. Still not great but a little bit better today. It just seems to be taking forever to lift this time. I haven't been able to get an apt with my GP yet but i'm seeing my CPN on Monday.
I have an assessment with the Eating Disorders Team on Tuesday too. I'm really nervous about it but hopefully they can help me.

((Big Hugs)) to you


Hey honey

Thank you - I am not great but have managed to get back on the forum which is good and hopefully things will look up. Thank you for asking.

Glad you are a little better but it does seem to be taking its time for you to settle. Good to hear you are seeing your CPN on Monday - I hope that goes well for you. Really good luck with the EDS appt - just be honest with them if you can and let them help you. They will be able to do that. It is scary but it is a really positive step forward.

Many hugs to you

Cracked xxx
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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby weepingwillow » Thu Apr 04, 2013 5:28 pm

CrackedGirl wrote:Hey honey

Thank you - I am not great but have managed to get back on the forum which is good and hopefully things will look up. Thank you for asking.

Glad you are a little better but it does seem to be taking its time for you to settle. Good to hear you are seeing your CPN on Monday - I hope that goes well for you. Really good luck with the EDS appt - just be honest with them if you can and let them help you. They will be able to do that. It is scary but it is a really positive step forward.

Many hugs to you

Cracked xxx

Hey,
I'm sorry you are still not feeling great, it is good that you have got back to the forum tho - you were missed!

((Big Hugs)) xxx

I'm still not great. Actually been really low today. I still haven't cut but I have opened up the old ones by picking at them.
I have eaten a little better so far today, although I just bought lots of binge food.
I really wanted to get some exercise today and go for a walk or run or something but just couldn't face it.
I just want to stay in bed and not see anyone but I can't, I need to look after my daughter.
I really hope this starts to lift soon. I hate being like this. :(
Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne
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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby CrackedGirl » Fri Apr 05, 2013 1:43 am

weepingwillow wrote:Hey,
I'm sorry you are still not feeling great, it is good that you have got back to the forum tho - you were missed!

((Big Hugs)) xxx

I'm still not great. Actually been really low today. I still haven't cut but I have opened up the old ones by picking at them.
I have eaten a little better so far today, although I just bought lots of binge food.
I really wanted to get some exercise today and go for a walk or run or something but just couldn't face it.
I just want to stay in bed and not see anyone but I can't, I need to look after my daughter.
I really hope this starts to lift soon. I hate being like this. :(


Thank you hon and huge hugs to you. Really sorry to hear you have been struggling so much and that you reopened some cuts. Well done for eating better and I hope you have been able to not binge and purge too much. Sounds like things are still tough for you and that you are finding it difficult. Definitely something to bring up with the professionals. Anyhow here for you and thinking of you

Huge hugs

Cracked xxx
So long and thanks for all the fish

Now we are out of the sea and we're keeping away from the sharks

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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby weepingwillow » Sun Apr 07, 2013 9:58 pm

I really need to sleep but I can't stop thinking about what might happen tomorrow. I really don't think I could cope with any more atm!
I hope i'm able to say what I need to say. I was thinking about writing it down but I want to be able to talk to people, I can't spend my life talking through notes! Actually I'm not even sure what im thinking. My heads a mess.

I lied to my sister and mum today. Mum rang and asked me to go up, I said no. She then text and asked if I was ok and I said "yep, im fine." then my sister rang to ask me to go so I told her no too. She then text and said I didn't sound right and am I sure im ok, and I said "yep fine, just tired." They both left me alone after that.

Something really needs to change. I can't do this. I'm getting desperate. I've tried everything that usually helps to lift my mood and nothings working!!! I can't stay in this mood! This isn't me. I hate it! I haven't even got the energy to pretend anymore. I feel like i'm going completely crazy. I just want to sleep.
Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne
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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby CrackedGirl » Tue Apr 09, 2013 3:13 am

Huge hugs honey

I really hope specialist ED input helps them figure out how to best help you. Thinking of you and sending so many hugs

Cracked xxx
So long and thanks for all the fish

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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby weepingwillow » Tue Apr 09, 2013 8:24 pm

Hey,

How are you doing?

Thank you so much!
Today went ok. I have another appt with the therapist next week.
Someone from social services rang me and doesn't look like they're taking it any further, she just told me to call if I need anything. I had to tell my ex everything before the social worker rang him. I think hes ok about it although he's already trying to stop me doing a sponsored walk I do every year for charity.

My friends came round tonight, it was really nice to see them. I need to make more of an effort with them. I almost cancelled because my mood still isn't great but i'm glad I didn't and I didn't have to pretend as much as I usually do.

I haven't had any urges to cut since Sunday so hopefully my mood will lift soon and it will be easier to resist again.

I'm going to get an early night tonight and try to get some good sleep. Hopefully that will help too, I haven't slept much past couple of nights with being nervous about todays appt.

((Big Hugs)) xxx
Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne
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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby whybother » Wed Apr 10, 2013 4:19 am

weepingwillow wrote: I think hes ok about it although he's already trying to stop me doing a sponsored walk I do every year for charity.


Do the walk anyway ! If for no other reason than for the social interaction. When is the walk?

My friends came round tonight,


I'm jealous!

I haven't had any urges to cut since Sunday so hopefully my mood will lift soon and it will be easier to resist again.


Congradulations! Reward yourself!
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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby weepingwillow » Wed Apr 10, 2013 5:22 pm

Thanks whybother,

How are you?
I will definitely be doing the walk! I've done it for the last five years - not about to stop now! Its at the start of June, i'm looking forward to it.
If I can make it until Saturday without cutting i'm going to get my hair done.
((Big Hugs))

I'm not feeling too good today. I'm really dizzy and weak. I tried to eat a little but it just made me feel really sick.
I've run out of heating again! Going to try and get a crisis loan tomorrow so hopefully it wont be for too long this time.
My mood doesn't seem quite as bad, its hard to tell tho because I feel so rough and exhausted. I'm hoping its picking up tho.
Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne
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weepingwillow
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Re: weepingwillow's journal

Postby weepingwillow » Thu Apr 11, 2013 7:49 am

Feel really good today :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

I'm soooooo glad my mood has picked up again!! I think this is going to be a good day :mrgreen:
Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne
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