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Need help/advice with possible OCD habit/ritual

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Need help/advice with possible OCD habit/ritual

Postby quinn808 » Mon May 09, 2022 2:12 am

Hello everyone,

I want to talk about a habit or ritual that I'm struggling with for the past couple of years.

Whenever I start working on some task that holds a lot of importance to me such as studying or applying for jobs. I start having these thoughts:

• I'm not doing this properly or in an orderly manner
• I'm not putting my best effort
• I'm not working hard

These thoughts become overwhelming. I feel bad and start hating myself for not working hard or properly.

As a result, I often stop doing that work and just start doing useless things like scrolling through my phone, listening to music, or masturbating as means of escapism from these unpleasant thoughts.

After wasting hours or a whole day like this, I decides to get out of it so that I can do the work I need to do. Here, I do some kind of ritual. I feel like my thinking is not organized or it's all over the place or I'm not thinking enough. To get out of it, In my head, I say something like "Ok, calm down" or "let's do this" and then I change my thinking. If my thinking is still not organized or in the proper direction, I repeat this ritual again and again. I call this calibration or reset. I feel an urge to do this to make things in order again.

It's frustrating. I often abandon important work because I keep having these thoughts that I'm not doing it properly or the way I'm working on it is not enough. I need to put more effort. It's like wanting something perfect or not at all.

After that, I spend hours doing useless things to distract myself from unpleasant thoughts. Then I do this ritual to "organize" my thinking so that I can get things done.

But, the problem is that I am never able to work "properly" or in an ideal way and I keep repeating this cycle again and again. This has messed up my head a lot and I feel stuck in this loop. I've wasted the majority of my time during the past 4 months and couldn't able to get important things done.

I have also developed a fear of working on these important tasks and started avoiding them because of how overwhelming and unpleasant these thoughts get.

Another thing to note is that I often make promise to myself that tomorrow I'll work on the thing that I need to work on but whenever there is a tiny slipup for example If I decided to wake up at 8:00 am and unable to do so, I feel like my whole day is ruined or things are not in order. So, I end up wasting whole day. I keep repeating this most of the time. As a result, I hardly finish any of my important work.

From what I know, it looks like symptoms of OCD. I want to know if anyone experienced this or performed this particular ritual. If yes, how can I manage or overcome this?

Any advice/help will be greatly appreciated.
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Re: Need help/advice with possible OCD habit/ritual

Postby Snaga » Mon May 09, 2022 2:39 am

Hello and welcome!


The only advice I have is simple but hard to get started. For me, it would involve an attitude of not caring that I hadn't got a good start or did the thing right, and keep on with it without the rituals. Or the avoidance. It's a matter of rewiring. It's also not as if you really don't care- it's the attitude that you don't that to me is the important thing. The world will not end if it's not 'properly' done. Is that attitude needed. Even though it really isn't that you don't care about doing a good job.
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Re: Need help/advice with possible OCD habit/ritual

Postby quinn808 » Mon May 09, 2022 5:30 am

Snaga wrote:Hello and welcome!


The only advice I have is simple but hard to get started. For me, it would involve an attitude of not caring that I hadn't got a good start or did the thing right, and keep on with it without the rituals. Or the avoidance. It's a matter of rewiring. It's also not as if you really don't care- it's the attitude that you don't that to me is the important thing. The world will not end if it's not 'properly' done. Is that attitude needed. Even though it really isn't that you don't care about doing a good job.

I really appreciate your advice!
quinn808
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