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Another "OCD" post

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Another "OCD" post

Postby Kaleb28 » Thu Jul 22, 2021 12:35 am

I've tried I've really really tried to stop going onto here and comparing myself to others I've tried to stop the "compulsions" but I can't stop it's so hard I know this isn't ocd and I'll explain why: I read a recent post stated OCD is limited to the imagination well my thoughts aren't when I see an attractive guy I know he is attractive and why do I know he's attractive and that it's not just good asthetics, it's because I get the same feelings that I used to get when I saw an attractive woman (and still rarely get) I'm like damn, he's hot I even find men's butts attractive, and I hate it, how do I know I like it, because I find it hot! my thoughts aren't if I do so and so action will i turn gay? There "I dislike that I find men attractive I wish I didn't find women attractive exclusively for the past 7 years", "I remember feeling different a year ago from this point and being happy" and so on and so forth I want my old life back I don't want to find men attractive though I don't think there's much I can do about it I remember reading on an LGBTQ website there "stages of coming out" and one of them was finding the same sex attractive and being scared because of having to relaquish what we thought we where well I guess thats what I'm gonna have to do I've also come to the realization that I hate finding men attractive and I'm like damn just keeps confirming and confirming, I remember back in April when I started getting stressed out and I said this is going to get worse and worse and loe and behold it's gotten worse in the past three months I want to go back to normal but but I are just attractive I want to go to a therapist but I'm afraid there going to confirm to me that I'm gay, and I won't freak out no no no no I'll just become more and more depressed because that's what keeps happening. I hate my life this just makes me realize how close I held sexuality also I don't think I would mind having sex with a guy the problem for me is that I'm isolated and don't get out I'm just a socially anxious person so I just don't know I'm fairly positive that I'd be able to, but like I said in the beginning I read a post that said the thoughts are limited by imagination, well is attraction imagination, no they aren't, I'm so anxious that I can't desern weather I'd actually want to do these things or not. Most people on this forum talk about false attraction well this definitely isn't false I just dislike that I find men attractive I'm just sad if I told any outside observer that I find men hot they would obviously say that I'm gay, when I masterbate to a guy I just stop and go to women not out of disgust necessarily but out of I'm to scared to figure out the tuth

I know I made a 4 page long thread in another forum and I promise not to do that here I can just talk all day about this subject so I'm sorry In advance

-- Wed Jul 21, 2021 4:40 pm --

I also realize I should have posted this in the sexuality forum I'm just still clinging on to this false idea of ocd I'm sorry to the moderators in advance
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