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Terrified if I'm attracted to my mother, or if it's just OCD

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Terrified if I'm attracted to my mother, or if it's just OCD

Postby Reddit239384134 » Thu Dec 06, 2018 9:19 am

I'm taking this medication (MAOI) called Nardil which affects your libido. It's been hard to masturbate. I've had urges, but I can't release. Sometimes I'm at my computer for 5 hours. This morning, I had another session which lasted 3 hours. At the end, I started thinking of my mother when she was younger, and I ended up ejaculating somehow.

I have had OCD like symptoms and intrusive thoughts since I was a teenager. These OCD like traits have also led me to develop intrusive thoughts about various people I'd be uncomfortable having such thoughts about. I'm challenging myself, trying to determine if I'm really not sexually attracted to certain people I'm close to. It's like my mind is telling me "Haha, let's see if you're gay or attracted to your family!", even though I'm not a homophobe. Family members and male friends mainly. But because I'm not gay or a pedophile, these thoughts have mostly centered on my mother. I've had many moments where I've had slight sexual stimulation around my mother, or when she pops into my mind. Also, she pops into my mind frequently when I'm ejaculating to a picture of someone online.

I'm terrified of being sexually attracted to her, I would feel violated. Is this incest, or OCD?
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