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Reflecting on HOCD and POCD

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Reflecting on HOCD and POCD

Postby Andrew123 » Thu Aug 09, 2018 7:32 am

A few months back I thought I was suffering from HOCD/POCD/literally all the things related to OCD you could imagine.
Why I'm doing this post then if I 'used to' suffer ?
Because whenever I think about them, the OCD obsessions start to come back.
First off, I want to clarify that I know 100% for certain that I'm not a homosexoal, nor a pedophile. For all POCD sufferers, how do I know this ? Because I don't feel attracted to MALES, nor do I feel sexually/romantically atracted to CHILDREN.
My POCD was so horrible that I used to literally draw circles on paper while thinking to a girl I like(being my age ofc) and then draw a cirlce while thinking to a children. IF SOMEHOW the cirlce was different, I would instanlty think that I'm a pedophile. It was strange.
Anyways. Why I'm writting this post?
I want to ask you about a ex-compulsion ritual I had to prove that I'm not a pedophile.
I would literally stand for hours and breath while thinking to my girlfriend, and then think to a random children. When thinking about that kid, I would feel panic and anxiety. After all, is feeling anxiety about a thing you fear being normal ?
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