News of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Forum

Hi all,

Prewarning - long read, please bear with me

I grew up always considering myself to be straight. I had crushes on girls and feelings towards them since I can remember. I had my first sexual encounter with a girl at the age of 17, which I enjoyed. I can’t recall ever having any sexual feelings towards men, it was strictly friends. While going through puberty, I would masturbate exclusively to the thoughts and ...

The websites I have seen about OCD say that obsessions include fears of contamination, fear of being robbed/burgled, fear of something bad happening; like someone will die if you don't do a compulsion. My fears are not like these at all, but I get the nagging feeling it still might be OCD. Examples:

1. I am afraid of homeless people. I see them, and I'm scared of becoming like them, I feel responsible for the ...

Do you ever feel like there's so much proof that you're trans? That everything makes sense, that you don't feel like your biological gender anymore and it starts feeling as if you were always of different gender? Yet, even when I say that okay, I'm trans, I'll transition, every time I feel deep in my heart that I don't want to do it. Sometimes it feels like punishement. Yet everytime I see guys one the ...

Do you ever feel like there's so much proof that you're trans? That everything makes sense, that you don't feel like your biological gender anymore and it starts feeling as if you were always of different gender? Yet, even when I say that okay, I'm trans, I'll transition, every time I feel deep in my heart that I don't want to do it. Sometimes it feels like punishement. Yet everytime I see guys one the ...

Hello.

This is my umpteenth post while going through HOCD since last October. I am doing better every day and I am sure I am not gay, but there is a feeling I'd like to discuss: I have 'depowered' my gay intrusive thoughts, which means that I'm free to imagine myself with girls again. There has been a significant loss of attraction when fantasizing about girls (not in real life, I have always kept checking ...

my ocd is killing me. eating me alive. i'm a lesbian obsessed with lesbian conversion porn. i can't stop looking at it even though it disgusts me, my compulsions tell me to look no matter how hard i try to resist, it's like somebody else is in my body, forcing me to look. i cry and i self harm and i break down but it's not enough to stop the compulsions. it's been this way ...

So I'm 19 years old and gay I've know I've been gay since about 12 or 13 always liked guys never had feel I vs for girls ask did for guys and i was happy it felt right and me. So I've suffers from different ocd themes for the past years but I'm scared in turning straight and loosing intrest/attraction in guys. Like I look at girls I don't feel sexual or anything but then ...

I just watched the new Bohemian Rhapsody movie. First he liked a girl, obviously thought he was straight and later on looked after a man at which point he realised he was gay. This was not so much of a trigger on its own, but watching the whole movie, looking at the guys with tight pants and no shirts, grinding on each other in gay clubs and organising orgies, and having romantic relationships...
I started ...

I just want to shut this thought off, it is giving me hell.

"I'm a transsexual" is repeating in my head.

I really don't want it to.

Please, I do not want to be trans.

I can't take what is going on.

This is giving me hell.

I have dealt with this for SIX YEARS and it is driving me utterly crazy.

I can't deal with this.

Please I just want it to stop.

How ...

Hey,

I’m feeling scared and concerned right now.

6 years ago I was diagnosed with OCD due to the intrusive thoughts I have and the reassurance seeming and rumination I did in response to them.

Nowadays I don’t really reassurance seek that much but I do get sucked into sometimes.

Anyway, today I had an assessment with the IAPT and I explained about the thoughts and gave him some examples of them.

However, at the ...