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Confused about my growing up

Hi all,

I'm not sure where to start, and how to end, considering the state of the forum and the chance if someone coming across this topic. I think my childhood wasn't that good considering the person that I am. I usually say that it is, even in therapy, but my mother was physical with my brother and I
Mostly with him. I think the main thing with me is that I was emotionally neglected, ...
Read more : Confused about my growing up | Views : 877 | Replies : 1


caretaker blurted to manipulate/brain wash

my caretaker said the other day: one must do stuff to get whatever they want be it manipulation, brainwash.

she said it nonchalantly. as a matter of fact. something she's neither proud of, nor ashamed of. just as something one must do to get stuff.

earlier also she had said stuff like: i am used to indulge in emotional blackmail. dont take me seriously.

but after the recent comment, i feel sad. just sad.
i ...
Read more : caretaker blurted to manipulate/brain wash | Views : 1060 | Replies : 2


i want to mourn rather than move on

i dont want to be happy. it feels like betraying my past.
any step i take toward a future(new friendship) feels like step away from past n the hope that i change it.
i dont want to stop mourning my past. i dont want to bury the dead body of my past
Read more : i want to mourn rather than move on | Views : 1277 | Replies : 0


psychological abuse?

Hi, I am new to the forum and my first post. I have been troubled by something I observed over the holiday. In short, I am a SA survivor at the hands of my Bio Father. This was many years ago and long story short, I have all the leftover scars THUS, I may be hypersensitive to other children's experiences.

My SIL is VERY aggressive with my grands. He forces them to hug him all ...
Read more : psychological abuse? | Views : 1353 | Replies : 2


My experiences with my violent mother and possible effects

Hello, this is something I thought would be worth sharing as it might help myself and others who went through similar experiences to make sense of things better.

I am currently 23, male, chiming in from Asia. I've been officially diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but I also struggle greatly with OCD, and my most prominent issue is aggresive thoughts and urges - which I can keep under check for the most part. Lately I've been ...
Read more : My experiences with my violent mother and possible effects | Views : 1391 | Replies : 0


My mom is a psychologist (Psy.D) and a foul human being

I was abused throughout childhood in many ways. She was really, really good at it. She used her education to superb effect. Discussing it is humiliating. This was the strategy to begin with, I think (that is, that make the abuse as difficult to mediate as possible).

Advice?
Read more : My mom is a psychologist (Psy.D) and a foul human being | Views : 1258 | Replies : 1


Finally sleeping well

Monday last week my mother finally passed on. She was cremated two days later with no service and no family present, no acknowledgement she had ever lived. I received the phone call at 10.25pm from the nursing home, and I guessed I moved into some state of disassociation soon after. Possibly lasted until four or five days later. Found myself over working here at home and becoming more and more exhausted. This culminated in a ...
Read more : Finally sleeping well | Views : 2637 | Replies : 3


I grew up isolated from the society until I was an adult

Hi, as of the time of writing, I'm almost 23 years old, Male, from Asia. I grew up in an emotionally abusive household and there were also other things that are irrevelent here. My abusive mother died almost a year ago, but I still live with my dad. I want to share something strange that spanned the entirety of my childhood and adolescence: I was pretty much locked up in the house and not allowed ...
Read more : I grew up isolated from the society until I was an adult | Views : 2513 | Replies : 4


will i ever get better

i am so so tired. day in and day out i think of what ifs, of the past, if only.
my emotions go from:
--rage toward caretaker, abuser, old friends who didnt support me as much as i wish they had, teachers...
(i get angry toward anyone who ever harmed me, i its volcano anger)

-- sorrow to the point where i have no desire left to live :( ...
Read more : will i ever get better | Views : 2487 | Replies : 0


So what do you want to do when you grow up ??

I had problems in high school. I behaved, did not break rules but I think teachers did not like me. I did very poor academically.

"if you could live at any time in history when would you live" - 1492 as a mercenary knight operating out of Germany where I could kill, rape and plunder - sir" - I read a lot as a child.

"What do you want to do when you grow up" ...
Read more : So what do you want to do when you grow up ?? | Views : 1952 | Replies : 3


 

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